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" I write because I like to make things and the only things I am good at making things with are words. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Words
Write
Good
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" America's public schools have served their purpose. Free and compulsory education was good for a somewhat unpromising young nation. "
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" America gives every appearance of being a nation besotted with trashiness - divorce, illegitimacy, casual Fridays. "
P. J. O'Rourke
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Appearance
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" I am a student of stupidity. I am a political reporter. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Am
I Am
Stupidity
" Simply because something is a populist movement doesn't make it either good or bad. "
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" Kids are disorganized. "
P. J. O'Rourke
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Kids
" I like Michael Moore, but I think of him more as a rabble-rouser. On his TV show, when he went to the home of the guy who invented the car alarm and set off all the car alarms on the block... pretty funny. "
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Home
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" In the Soviet Union, no industry went under until they all did. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Soviet
Industry
Soviet Union
" Once you've built the big machinery of political power, remember you won't always be the one to run it. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Run
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Remember
" Politics is a necessary evil, or a necessary annoyance, a necessary conundrum. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Politics
Necessary Evil
Evil
" No industry in living memory has collapsed faster than daily print journalism. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Journalism
Memory
Print
" Kabul is a walled city, which sounds romantic except the walls are pre-cast reinforced concrete blast barriers, 10 feet tall and 15 feet long and moved into place with cranes. The walls are topped with sandbags, and the sandbags are topped with guard posts from which gun barrels protrude. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Gun
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" People are always angry at America. They're absolutely certain that America either caused their problems or is deliberately not fixing their problems. But the anger is always directed at America and never at Americans. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Angry
America
Anger
" Northwest Ohio is flat. There isn't much up. The land is so flat that a child from Toledo is under the impression that the direction hills go is down. Sledding is done down from street level into creek beds and road cuts. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Road
Street
Go
" The Clinton administration launched an attack on people in Texas because those people were religious nuts with guns. Hell, this country was founded by religious nuts with guns. Who does Bill Clinton think stepped ashore on Plymouth Rock? "
P. J. O'Rourke
Hell
People
Texas
" Fascism is very much a mob movement. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Much
Fascism
Mob
" A Kindle returns us to the inconvenience of the scroll, except with batteries and electronic glitches. It's as handy as bringing Homer along to recite the 'Iliad' while playing a lyre. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Kindle
Electronic
Us
" I look around my house, and everything except the kids and dogs was made in China. And I'm not sure about the kids. They have brown eyes and small noses. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Small
House
Everything
" Obama's space policy doesn't differ much from George W. Bush's. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Policy
Obama
Bush
" We have the British motor industry as a role model for what happens when you try to save an industrial dinosaur. Britain was the first country to industrialise and the first to de-industrialise. We should learn from this. "
P. J. O'Rourke
You
Role Model
Learn
" Moviemakers are rewarded with tax write-offs if, when seeking a location that looks like America, they seek it in America. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Location
America
Like
" What Enron was doing, what caused investors to embrace it in a rapture of baffled awe, was hiding debt. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Enron
Awe
Debt
" I knew Hunter Thompson since the '70s, and I loved him, but he would wear me out as I got older. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Got
Older
Me
" Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does it to somebody else. This is the idea behind foreign policy. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Government
Whatever
Policy
" In midlife, we're as dumb as we get. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Get
Dumb
" You can't destroy America by destroying our elite. Think about America's elite. Think about it down through history. Destroy our elite, and about half the time, you're doing us a favor. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Down
America
You
" Even the most left-wing politicians worship wealth creation - as the political-action-committee collection plate is passed. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Politicians
Creation
Worship
" The laws of the marketplace are physical laws, and they don't become suspended in a crisis any more than the law of gravity does. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Gravity
Law
Laws
" Politics is the one field you don't age out of. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Field
You
Politics
" Regulation creates a moral hazard. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Hazard
Regulation
Moral
" America wasn't founded so that we could all be better. America was founded so we could all be anything we damned well pleased. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Pleased
Well
Anything