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" If you really want to kill yourself, you get a gun and blow your head off. "
Lorna Luft
Want
Gun
Head
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" I have spent much of my adult life flinching with pain as I tried to pull out the threads that bound the shadows of my past to me. "
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Shadows
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" My mother wasn't rational those last years; if she had been, she would have been horrified by her own behavior. "
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" Although I loved Liza as a little girl, it would be true to say I really didn't know her. "
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True
" A gay man has no business leading on a heterosexual woman. "
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Leading
Gay
Business
" Living in continual chaos is exhausting, frightening. The catch is that it's also very addictive. "
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Very
Living
Frightening
" My mother's life had been destroyed by the Garland legend. "
Lorna Luft
Mother
Been
Destroyed
" There are some family traditions I don't want my children to carry on. "
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Want
Traditions
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" It was at one of the parties at our house that The Rat Pack got started. "
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Started
Pack
Rat Pack
" The most memorable night of The Judy Garland Show for me was the night my mother pulled me out of the audience and sang to me onstage. "
Lorna Luft
Mother
Night
Memorable
" Studio 54 made Halloween in Hollywood look like a PTA meeting. "
Lorna Luft
Meeting
Hollywood
PTA
" When your parent is a public idol, you never really have a chance to lay that parent to rest. "
Lorna Luft
You
Chance
Never
" My mother was a phoenix who always expected to rise from the ashes of her latest disaster. She loved being Judy Garland. "
Lorna Luft
Rise
Mother
Always
" The one thing I never questioned about my mother was whether she loved me. "
Lorna Luft
Never
One Thing
Loved
" Between them, my parents had 10 marriages. "
Lorna Luft
Parents
Had
Marriages
" Barry Manilow has gone from being the love of my life to being a friend for life. "
Lorna Luft
Love
Life
Gone
" Fabio kept asking me out, but I knew we'd never get his ego through the door. "
Lorna Luft
Me
Never
Asking
" Vincente understood all too well what was happening to Liza; he had gone through it 40 years earlier with my mother. "
Lorna Luft
Through
Well
Years
" When I look back at The Judy Garland Show, I have such mixed feelings. It broke my mother's heart when they canceled it. "
Lorna Luft
Look
Mother
Back
" The sicker mother got, the stranger the people surrounding her became. I called them The Garland Freaks. "
Lorna Luft
Her
Got
Them
" I have a healthy body, free of the chemicals that once controlled it. "
Lorna Luft
Health
Healthy
Chemicals
" My mother's suicide attempts were a way to release anxiety and get attention. Some of the attempts were drug reactions she didn't even remember later on. "
Lorna Luft
Anxiety
Suicide
She
" I spent an entire evening seated between Fred Astaire and Gene Kelly, being charmed from either side. It was pure Hollywood magic. "
Lorna Luft
Side
Evening
Hollywood
" Life will force you to make changes you never wanted to make. "
Lorna Luft
You
Will
Never
" Liza is in the tabloids almost as much as our mother was. She has struggled with her own ghosts and shadows. "
Lorna Luft
Her
She
Own
" When you're Judy Garland and you want something, you just pick up the phone and call somebody. Anybody. "
Lorna Luft
Up
You
Call
" Instead of joyfully looking forward to my birth, my mother began systematically preparing for her own death. She was fatalistic. "
Lorna Luft
Death
Mother
Looking Forward
" My sister Liza and I have never felt that we were in competition. "
Lorna Luft
Felt
Were
Sister
" Dodi got a lot of criticism when he began dating Princess Diana. No one seemed to think he was good enough for her. "
Lorna Luft
Dating
Think
Criticism
" When I got a call from Los Angeles to do the Tonight Show, I considered it more of an inconvenience than an opportunity. "
Lorna Luft
Show
More
Los Angeles
" The eyebrow pencil and false eyelashes were essential; my mother didn't feel dressed without them. "
Lorna Luft
Mother
Eyelashes
Feel