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" I'm much calmer when there's no TV or music playing in the background. "
Gretchen Rubin
Playing
Music
Much
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" Keeping a habit, in the smallest way, protects and strengthens it. I write every day, even if it's just a sentence, to keep my habit of daily writing strong. "
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" One of the best ways to make yourself happy in the present is to recall happy times from the past. Photos are a great memory-prompt, and because we tend to take photos of happy occasions, they weight our memories to the good. "
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" If you've had something for more than six months, and it's still not repaired, it's clutter. "
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" Enthusiasm is a form of social courage. "
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" For quotes, I have one document for general quotes; the other for happiness-related quotes, which I use for the 'Moment of Happiness,' my daily emails of happiness quotes. "
Gretchen Rubin
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" Although we often assume that feelings inspire actions, in fact, actions also inspire feelings. By pushing myself to act happier, I make myself feel happier. "
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" I love finding - or inventing - ways to categorize people. "
Gretchen Rubin
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" Remember that although the distinction can be difficult to draw, loneliness and solitude are different. "
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" Spending hours stressed out in front of the TV isn't the same as volunteering or donating. Feeling a high level of personal distress makes people feel agitated and emotionally drained, to the point that they lack the energy or detachment to help - or the energy to manage themselves. "
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" One of the most important elements of my identity is my identity as a reader. I love to read - really, if I'm honest with myself, it's practically the only activity that I truly love to do. "
Gretchen Rubin
Myself
Only
Identity
" It's hard to avoid 'unconscious overclaiming.' In unconscious overclaiming, we unconsciously overestimate our contributions relative to others. This makes sense, because we're far more aware of what we do than what other people do. Also, we tend to do the work that we value. "
Gretchen Rubin
Value
People
Others
" In the scope of a happy life, a messy desk or an overstuffed coat closet is a trivial thing, yet I find - and I hear from other people that they agree - that getting rid of clutter gives a disproportionate boost to happiness. "
Gretchen Rubin
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" When accepting a responsibility, imagine that it's something that you'll have to do next week. That way you don't agree to something just because it seems so far off that it doesn't seem onerous. "
Gretchen Rubin
Just Because
You
Week
" I've always loved 'Before and After' stories, in books, magazines, and TV shows. Whenever I read those words, I'm hooked. The thought of a transformation - any kind of transformation - thrills me. And that's the promise of habits. "
Gretchen Rubin
Loved
Thought
Words
" I collect axioms, paradoxes, maxims, teaching stories, proverbs, and aphorisms of all sorts, because I love to see complex ideas distilled into a few words. "
Gretchen Rubin
Love
See
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" Try to never say 'yes' on the phone; instead, say, 'I'll get back to you.' When you're actually speaking to someone, the desire to be accommodating is very strong, and can lead you to say 'yes' without enough consideration. "
Gretchen Rubin
Desire
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" I love taxonomies, categories, ways of dividing people into groups. "
Gretchen Rubin
Ways
People
Love
" Most decisions don't require extensive research. "
Gretchen Rubin
Require
Most
Decisions
" Often, the more reliably you perform a task, the less likely it is for someone to notice that you're doing it and to feel grateful and to feel any impulse to help or to take a turn. "
Gretchen Rubin
Grateful
Doing
You
" It was my interest in happiness that led me to the subject of habits, and of course, the study of habits is really the study of happiness. Habits are the invisible architecture of everyday life, and a significant element of happiness. "
Gretchen Rubin
Study
Life
Architecture
" I read a lot, all the time, but often I read books for research, or because they're interesting to me in some way, even if they aren't exactly 'pleasurable.' "
Gretchen Rubin
Research
Interesting
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" One of my key realizations about happiness, and a point oddly under-emphasized by positive psychologists, given its emphasis in popular culture, is that outer order contributes to inner calm. More than it should. "
Gretchen Rubin
Happiness
Culture
Key
" My writing tends to become very dense, so I have to keep some cushion. Sometimes, words that seem superfluous are actually essential for the overall effect. "
Gretchen Rubin
Words
Writing
Sometimes
" It's so easy to use tired, shopworn figures of speech. I love using long, fancy words but have learned - mostly from writing my biography of Winston Churchill - that short, strong words work better. I am ever-vigilant against the passive and against jargon, both of which are so insidious. "
Gretchen Rubin
Words
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Love
" A person with 'oppositional conversational style' is a person who, in conversation, disagrees with and corrects whatever you say. He or she may do this in a friendly way, or a belligerent way, but this person frames remarks in opposition to whatever you venture. "
Gretchen Rubin
You
Say
She
" I embrace treats, but I'm also very wary of treats. Treats help us feel energized, appreciated, and enthusiastic - but very often, the things we choose as 'treats' aren't good for us. The pleasure lasts a minute, but then feelings of guilt, loss of control, and other negative consequences just deepen the lousiness of the day. "
Gretchen Rubin
Negative
Day
Help
" It's easier to get rid of things when you're giving them to someone who can use them, but don't let this kind intention become a source of clutter itself. I have a friend who has multiple piles all over her house, each lovingly destined for a particular recipient. "
Gretchen Rubin
You
Giving
Her
" A series of small but real accomplishments gives people the energy and confidence to continue. For instance, a person who wants to write a novel might resolve to write one sentence each day. Or a person who wants to start running might resolve to run for one minute. "
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Day
" Skillful conversationalists can explore disagreements and make points in ways that feel constructive and positive rather than combative or corrective. "
Gretchen Rubin
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Feel
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" Many people keep photos in their homes, in their office, or in their wallet, and happy families tend to display large numbers of photos at home. In 'Happier at Home,' I write about my 'shrine to my family' made of photographs. "
Gretchen Rubin
Home
Numbers
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