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All Quotes by author - Vanessa Bayer

" As a child or young adult going through an illness, it can be stressful at times and boring and extremely alienating. "

" Being sick is the reason I went into comedy. "

" Cleveland gets crapped on a lot. "

" Every sketch goes through a rewrite stage where a group of writers sits around a table and pitches more jokes and ideas for the piece. "

" I can stay up watching TV so late. "

" I do think that the audience thinks it's funny when you break, but if you do it all the time, it loses something. "

" I felt that it was cool to even get to the point where I was able to audition on the actual 'SNL' stage. Looking back on it, I can't believe that I wasn't more nervous. "

" I had been on this improv team at this really great improv theater. It's called iO now. It used to be called Improv Olympic. They have showcases for Lorne Michaels and other writers and people who work at 'SNL' usually about once a year, although I don't know if it always happens. "

" I'm not totally sure what I want to be doing, but it's so fun to be on 'SNL' because you get exposed to so many different people and so many different experiences. It's a cool, lucky way to break into the business. "

" I sleep a lot on Sunday. It's really great. "

" It's like, backstage at 'SNL,' like, if you come back after a show or something, or a lot of times even at the after-parties, we're just pretty tired and like, 'Hey, what's up.' Just getting a drink and kind of chilling out. Nothing crazy. "

" It's so funny: at 'SNL,' Bill Hader always kind of treated me like his little sister and would kind of, like, lovingly bully me. "

" It's totally my dream job. I grew up watching 'Saturday Night Live.' We'd watch it at sleepover parties and quote it. "

" I usually meditate twice a day: Transcendental Meditation. "

" I've been watching a lot of A&E's 'Intervention.' I know that's sort of depressing, but I love watching it. "

" I've had some pretty rough interviews. And it's funny when people are interviewing you, and they sort of don't really understand what you do, and they kind of insult you. "

" I went to this one in Ohio, and then I became a counselor there, and it was just the most fun thing. I was so depressed when I came home from camp. "

" My dad is a really funny guy, and we would make jokes about my leukemia. When my friends would come over, we would joke about it, too. "

" My fridge is usually pretty empty. If I can get it together to order FreshDirect, I will have some fruit and yogurt in the fridge. But there isn't a ton of stuff you would cook with. "

" People think New York is crazy and busy, but it's actually a great place for lazy people to live. "

" There always have been funny women. "

" There are just so many funny kids and teenagers. They're just not aware of how funny they are. "

" The town I grew up in was at least fifty percent Jewish, so every weekend in the 7th grade, we went to Bar and Bat Mitzvahs. "

" To be honest, I don't even exactly know how to set up a Google alert. My brother has me on Google alert. So do my parents. But I'm not even sure how it works. "

" With 'Trainwreck,' because it wasn't live and we could do more takes, I feel like we broke a lot. "

" You feel like you need to deal with a lot if you're from Cleveland, so you learn to let things roll off your back, and you learn that humor is the best way to deal with it. "

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