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" Doctors tell me I have the body of a thirty year old. I know I have the brain of a fifteen year old. If you've got both, you can play baseball. "

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" You know, baseball's not stupid. Baseball does what the fans want, usually. "

" My father taught me that the only way you can make good at anything is to practice, and then practice some more. "

" When somebody wants to interview me, I've always got something to say. "

" The greatest competitor was Bob Gibson. He worked so fast out there and he always had the hood up. He always wanted to close his own deal. He never talked to you because he was battling so hard. I sure as hell don't miss batting against him, but I miss him in the game. "

" There is an old saying that money can't buy happiness. If it could, I would buy myself four hits every game. "

" Can you be a nicer gentleman, or a better man for your sport or your kids than Joe Paterno? "

" Umpires got power, man. You ever notice if you go to a ballpark and there's a close play on first base, they will not run the replay at the ballpark? I've seen umpires go underneath and call up and say if you run one more of those replays, we're gonna forfeit the game. That's how strong their union is. "

" If you screw up and do something, don't lie about it; come clean. "

" When guys do books or stories, all I like to see is the truth. "

" I met Gerald Ford. I met Richard Nixon. I met Jimmy Carter. I met Dwight Eisenhower when he was a general. George Bush senior. I haven't met Bill Clinton or George W. Bush, although I got a letter from him. "

" We were so poor when I was a kid that I had a sister who was stamped, 'Made In Japan.' "

" I was born on the day Lincoln was shot and the Titanic sank. "

" There's other ways to make your head and muscles bigger than just steroids. "

" You don't dominate any sport when you're over 40. "

" When you play this game twenty years, go to bat ten-thousand times, and get three-thousand hits, do you know what that means? You've gone zero for seven-thousand. "

" I would think if someone connected to steroids made the Hall of Fame, that would enhance my chances of making the Hall of Fame. "

" See the ball; hit the ball. "

" Baseball and the players association have rules. If you stay within the rules - which say that you can play while you're appealing - I don't see what anyone would be in arms about. "

" No matter how many times you say you're sorry, somebody is not going to hear you. "

" I get accused of talking about records. But it's the guys who interview me who ask about them. "

" I'm not going to go back to gambling; I mean, it's as simple as that. "

" I don't go to bed every night worried about getting back into baseball. "

" I actually went to some Gamblers Anonymous classes, and I sat there for three or four of them, and I'm trying to figure out what I have in similarities with these other people, and I could never find anything. It just seems like it wasn't the right place for me. "

" If somebody is gracious enough to give me a second chance, I won't need a third. "

" I like Barack Obama as a person. He's articulate, he knows sports, his brother-in-law's a coach. He always has the athletes to the White House. But I don't know about some of his policies and some of these people in Congress. "

" Who cares if you bunt for a base hit? "

" I'm not sure Mark McGwire was a Hall of Famer to begin with. "

" I look at the records, and you don't win the Cy Young seven times or the MVP without being a good player. "

" Never bet on baseball. "

" When I get the record, all it will make me is the player with the most hits. I'm also the player with the most at bats and the most outs. I never said I was a greater player than Cobb. "