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" Humor is perhaps a sense of intellectual perspective: an awareness that some things are really important, others not; and that the two kinds are most oddly jumbled in everyday affairs. "

Christopher Morley

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" If we discovered that we only had five minutes left to say all that we wanted to say, every telephone booth would be occupied by people calling other people to stammer that they loved them. "

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" When you sell a man a book, you don't sell him 12 ounces of paper and ink and glue - you sell him a whole new life. "

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" Read, every day, something no one else is reading. Think, every day, something no one else is thinking. Do, every day, something no one else would be silly enough to do. It is bad for the mind to continually be part of unanimity. "

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" Heavy hearts, like heavy clouds in the sky, are best relieved by the letting of a little water. "

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" No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does. "

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" Life is a foreign language; all men mispronounce it. "

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" There are three ingredients in the good life: learning, earning and yearning. "

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" No man is lonely eating spaghetti; it requires so much attention. "

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" It is unfair to blame man too fiercely for being pugnacious; he learned the habit from Nature. "

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" We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. "

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" The misfortunes hardest to bear are these which never came. "

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" From now until the end of time no one else will ever see life with my eyes, and I mean to make the best of my chance. "

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" A human being: an ingenious assembly of portable plumbing. "

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" A man who has never made a woman angry is a failure in life. "

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" Act like you expect to get into the end zone. "

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" In every man's heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty. "

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" Beauty is ever to the lonely mind a shadow fleeting; she is never plain. She is a visitor who leaves behind the gift of grief, the souvenir of pain. "

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" The real purpose of books is to trap the mind into doing its own thinking. "

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" There is only one success - to be able to spend your life in your own way. "

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" High heels were invented by a woman who had been kissed on the forehead. "

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" Dancing is a wonderful training for girls, it's the first way you learn to guess what a man is going to do before he does it. "

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" The bicycle, the bicycle surely, should always be the vehicle of novelists and poets. "

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" There is only one rule for being a good talker - learn to listen. "

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