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" I frequently dream of having tea with the Queen. "

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" I had Courtney Love's left bosom out of her dress on my plate in front of me. It was extraordinary. I didn't know where to look. "

" Japanese women have always loved my films, even when no one else did. Ever since I made 'Maurice' in the 1980s, I've been getting hundreds of letter from Japanese girls. They definitely have a special place in my heart. "

" Comedy is probably a way of dealing with anxiety. Sometimes it's a way of dealing with pain. "

" I don't hate L.A., but I'm nervous about becoming one of those people who has a ferocious interest in how films did at the box office that weekend and, you know, would want to meet for egg-white omelets in the morning. "

" Something about teaching is curiously attractive, actually. I don't know what it is. "

" Like lots of people who say, 'I'm going to write a novel,' it's actually more comfortable to think I could write a novel than to discover that you can't. "

" There were various turning points, but the main one at the beginning was that I was going off to do another degree in the history of art. I would have ended up as some art historian at Sotheby's or something. "

" I'm a terrible actor. I'm still learning. When I first started, I wish I knew then to trust myself more, really. I was in a terrible panic in the early part of my career. "

" And I particularly like the whole thing of being boss. Boss and employee... It's the slave quality that I find very alluring. "

" It's always more fun to be an anti-hero. They're more interesting. "

" Broadly speaking, there are two kinds of acting: character acting and lead acting. And in my life, to begin with, in the 1980s, it was all character acting. And then when, by fluke, through 'Four Weddings', I got into doing lead parts, it's a completely different thing. "

" I've certainly had a bad attitude to my job on many occasions. Not since 'Four Weddings and a Funeral'. I've been rather a good boy and really given it everything when I've accepted a part since then, because I've been given much better parts in films. "

" I don't want to see the end of popular print journalism. "

" Well, you know I have an office, my film offices. So I know that syndrome. I fancy offices, so there must be something wrong with me. Even the window cleaner intrigues me. It's a very sexy environment. "

" I'm not a great believer in marriages as an institution, or even in very long term relationships. I'm not sure we're built that way. "

" You know everyone loves to be the villain. "

" Women are frightening. If you get to 41 as a man, you're quite battle-scarred. "

" When I finished my degree at Oxford, I went and acted for a bit. And I was appalling. And with each part, I thought, 'Well, that's embarrassing. I'd better do one more to show people I'm not that bad.' And, in fact, instead of a taking a year, that's gone on for 35 years. "

" I certainly hated actors and, more importantly, they hated me. "

" Plus, teaching brings home to you very fast that you actually know nothing. I didn't realize that before. "

" I think I'm rather young and sprightly, but then you see pictures of yourself and think, 'Who is that old man?' and I realise I'm not as young as I thought I was. "

" I don't do much acting anymore anyway, and not to work for 20th Century Fox is really the least of my worries. "

" I suppose after 'Four Weddings' I was very busy for a bit, and I imagined that was my career, but I never had that thing of, 'I'm burning to be an actor. If I don't act, I'm not alive.' I've never had that. "

" I couldn't put my hand on my heart and say I think that being in a relationship is a natural state for a human being. "

" If you have a smothering parent, the effect it can apparently have on a child is to give them, in equal doses, a sense of too much self-esteem, because they are mummy's little princess or prince, and low self-esteem. It affects future relationships. "

" I never meant to be in romantic comedies; it's just what ended up happening. But they are tricky, in a post-1960s sexual revolution way. It was easier when you couldn't have sex scenes: everything crackled very nicely. They're not easy. "

" Neither Elizabeth or I are keen to do a real-life couple on the screen. It's not very electric. "

" I always admire the French and the Italians who are very devoted to their marriages. They take them extremely seriously, but it is understood that there might be other visitors at 5 o'clock in the afternoon. You just never boast about. They never say anything, but that's what keeps marriages together. "

" I have known a few good marriages, but very few. And others look to me like they're pretty miserable. I don't really think that's a recipe for happiness. "

" I find it hard to understand why Scorsese has never called. You know, given the natural menace I bring to the screen. "