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" I sing seriously to my mom on the phone. To put her to sleep, I have to sing 'Maria' from West Side Story. When I hear her snoring, I hang up. "

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" God gave me some weird, beautiful scent that makes men and women go crazy. People compare it to Carvel. It is a whale of a smell. "

" Sixth grade was a big time, in my childhood, of hoops and friendship, and coming up with funny things. "

" Chemistry can be a good and bad thing. Chemistry is good when you make love with it. Chemistry is bad when you make crack with it. "

" Well I have a microphone and you don't so you will listen to every damn word I have to say! "

" This character feels so much like my brother. He has two children. He has a wife. He works with me. He chooses to stay in New Hampshire because he wants his kids to grow up in the school they started with. He doesn't want them to lose friends. He is his family's hero. "

" A lot of critics object to what I do, but I got into comedy to make people laugh, and I've always worked hard. "

" My name is Adam Sandler. I'm not particularly talented. I'm not particularly good-looking. And yet I'm a multi-millionaire. "

" I still get very scared when I step in front of a live audience. "

" I had my moments of being humiliated, and then I had moments of doing something humiliating. I'm glad I lived out both roles. "

" I don't know who I touch and who I don't. I work hard trying to make people laugh. I try to do the kind of stuff that made me laugh growing up. I don't have any secrets. I don't know the reasons I've been so well received. "

" I definitely connected to the fact that life gets out of control and you end up doing things and wishing you were doing other things instead. "

" I mean, I look at my dad. He was twenty when he started having a family, and he was always the coolest dad. He did everything for his kids, and he never made us feel like he was pressured. I know that it must be a great feeling to be a guy like that. "

" When you're around the kids, you feel like you act the most grown up just because you're supposed to lead. I say things, like every other parent, that reminds you of your own parents. One thing I do know about being a parent, you understand why your father was in a bad mood a lot. "

" Now that I'm a parent, I understand why my father was in a bad mood a lot. "

" I think the reason I don't read is because, when I'm reading, I feel like I'm missing out on something else. You know, What are my friends doing? Where's my girlfriend? "

" I know I want to always do the best I can. "

" When I got into this, I never thought about reviews. I never thought about what people would say about me, I was just a young guy who was excited to become a comedian and an actor, and I just wanted to get to do what I got to do. "

" I was raised by a mother who told me I was great every day of my life. "

" Most of the stuff I do on the show comes out of me just trying to make my friends laugh. "

" As a kid, I'd go into the bathroom when I was having a tantrum. I'd be in the bathroom crying, studying myself in the mirror. I was preparing for future roles. "

" The Canteen Boy, the reason you feel bad for him and you can laugh is because he, and I guess a lot of my characters, they don't notice they're getting made fun of. So they'll say something back that's not that great a quip, but in their mind they won the argument. "

" Doing Saturday Night Live definitely affects my relationship with my girlfriend and with my family, because you feel so much pressure to do well that night. But I think everyone's grown to accept that and so they give me my space at the show. "

" My father wasn't perfect. He had a temper. I took some of that. He would snap, but the older he got, he started calming down. He learned about life, but the thing that he taught my whole family was that family was the most important thing and, no matter what, if a family member needs you, you go and help them out; you get there. "

" I've been called a moron since I was about four. My father called me a moron. My grandfather said I was a moron. And a lot of times when I'm driving, I hear I'm a moron. I like being a moron. "