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" I think that it should just be a rule of thumb that if your job asks you to cut your hair... that means that it's time to quit that job. "

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" I think what's cool about Slayer is no matter how old their albums are, it's the one band to me that their sound is immortal. It never sounds corny to me. You can go back and listen to some Pantera and Metallica albums, and you're like, 'OK, great music.' But Slayer, you go back, and they always sound fresh and hard as hell. "

" Me and turtlenecks are not friends. "

" So many parents these days are totally cool with their kids living on the couch the whole time. It's like a new thing with families. But you've got to leave the nest and get out there. "

" See, I'm a Pisces, so I get down with love songs. I'm totally into slow jams and old-school R&B, all that. "

" I pretty much figure a collar will do, but as time goes on, I'm hoping I learn how to throw a suit on or something. I've still got some time. I'm not the president of the United States yet. "

" I love mayonnaise. Every birthday when I was a kid I'd go to Black Angus and just dip my burger in mayo. "

" A lot of my music that I like puts energy in your body or makes you want to dance or break something or just go mosh or jump around. "

" I just bought a Jeep painted like an American flag. No one better question how patriotic I am. "

" My favorite album of all time is 'In A Major Way.' Look it up, it is a classic! "

" I think sketch writing is a good spot for everyone to start because it requires you to develop characters, have a beginning, middle and end and have a bunch of jokes in a short amount of time. "