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" I will never do Pilates. I walk. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

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" In our 20s, women in my generation, we all wanted to be Laurie Anderson. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" I think live music is really, really important. And I think it's very important to do together. It's much more fun to play to music together than the one person listening to their lone iPod Shuffle. I think it's an amazing way to build community and have children do things that are funded that's not a videogame. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" I eye 'Modern Love' warily between that second and third cup of coffee on Sunday mornings, calculating how much of a push I need to get through the day's unhurriedly earnest saga of heartbreak and recovery. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" In the end, the real wisdom of menopause may be in questioning how fun or even sane this chore wheel called modern life actually is. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" My generation is so used to having our public spaces look like the Starbucks, with the beautiful lighting and the little bit of Nina Simone and my coffee that's blended a certain way from Costa Rica. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" I am shamed to realize that in my marriage, my daughters never heard their father and me fight, which also meant, perhaps, that we didn't truly communicate. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" I'm a journalist, so my friends are journalists: magazines, newspapers, even public radio. Nobody had their kids in public school. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" The literature of menopause is the saddest, the most awful, and the most medical of all genres. You're sleepless, you're anxious, you're fat, you're depressed - and the advice is always the same: take more walks, eat some kale, and drink lots of water. It didn't help. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" I think private school is much better at customer service and making the parents feel better, especially in Los Angeles. It's almost like a spa for the parents where you drop your kids off, where they give you a beautifully baked thing and let the parents write their own newsletter about global warming. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" In the end, we all want a wife. But the home has become increasingly invaded by the ethos of work, work, work, with twin sets of external clocks imposed on a household's natural rhythms. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" There's an image that some of us have of Jackie Onassis, stepping out in the rain, and Maurice Tempelsman is holding her umbrella. We want that man. We want the man to be the concierge and the masseur and the travel booker. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" I'd be lying if I claimed that, in spite of our amiable afternoons, I don't have an ache somewhere in my heart that my children will not be playing Carnegie Hall anytime soon. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" When husbands and wives not only co-work but try to co-homemake, as post-feminist and well-intentioned as it is, out goes the clear delineation of spheres, out goes the calm of unquestioned authority, and of course, out goes the gratitude. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" I really don't think our school system is an evil borg force. It's sort of like the government. It's not even efficient enough to be a borg of total evil, even if it wanted to be. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" In our youths, many of us suspected that being tied down to a partner and family might constrain us. But after 40, even that landscape starts to shift. Many singletons turn inward and start longing for the things so many of us longed to be free of in our 20s. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" Having blown up my own long-term marriage via an extramarital affair, followed by a traumatic divorce, I tend to think of love as less a gently glowing hearth than a set of flaming train tracks you strap yourself onto. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" You go into the book store, there's the cut-out of Dr. Phil, and then the dreaded women's health section where every book, instead of the menopause book with the fanged Medusa head on the cover that might be more pertinent, you always see a flower and a poppy and a daisy and a stethoscope. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" I think of the friends of mine who were blissfully single in their 20s and 30s. Still single in their 40s and 50s, they seem to be contracting a bit. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" Whether you wish to chant 'Our houses, our selves' or 'We have houses, hear us roar,' for us women, home is where the heart is. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" Menopause is your return to where you were before, when your hormone levels are the same as a pre-adolescent girl's. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" I am stricken with the peculiar curse of being a 21st-century woman who makes more than the man she's living with - first with a husband for 13 years and now with a new partner. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" If I was going to pretend to be the supermom next door, it would've been counterfeit and a lie. I figured I had to write something out of a new place. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" I cohabited for 20 years with my longtime husband and father of my two now-teen daughters in a stable family household. "

Sandra Tsing Loh

" I don't know how it's going for my sisters, but as my 40s and Verizon bills and mortgage payments roll on, I seem to have an ever more recurring 1950s housewife fantasy. "

Sandra Tsing Loh