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" I would love to learn how to air kiss non-awkwardly. "
Ned Beauman
Learn
Would
Kiss
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" Plot is tremendously important to me: I can't stand books where nothing happens, and I can't imagine ever writing a novel without at least one murder. "
Ned Beauman
Important
Writing
Stand
" Just as the best way to judge an adult is by his or her record collection, the best way to judge a pub is by the albums on its jukebox. "
Ned Beauman
Best
Way
Just
" I'm reasonably good at talking onstage, but actually holding court in a pub is all to do with power dynamics which I don't think has anything to do with fiction. "
Ned Beauman
Talking
Pub
Power
" Until I was 16, I read nothing but science fiction. I loved William Gibson and I still do. But my favourite book when I was growing up, for a long time, was 'Snow Crash' by Neal Stephenson, which I must have read about a dozen times when I was a teenager. "
Ned Beauman
Book
Time
Loved
" I was always determined that one way or another I would force a book on the world, even if I had to resort to writing one about a tabby cat who solves mysteries. "
Ned Beauman
Writing
Way
Book
" There's never a bad time to put earplugs in. They're the kind of thing you can reject as a bit lame, but somebody told me to do start wearing earplugs and it turned out to be great advice. "
Ned Beauman
Time
Advice
You
" I'm very finicky about when I'm in the right mood to write. So most days, I find some excuse not to do anything. "
Ned Beauman
Anything
Days
Find
" The simile has to match the tone of its surroundings and has to be like a little joke. Writing a simile that isn't funny on some level is quite hard. "
Ned Beauman
Writing
Surroundings
Like
" I started my first novel when I was 10, and have produced thousands of pages of juvenilia since. "
Ned Beauman
Started
Pages
Since
" I always save a huge book for a flight, because then you read it at both airports and on the plane and by the time you get home you're a quarter of the way through and it doesn't feel so unmanageable any more. "
Ned Beauman
Time
Book
Feel
" I read 'The Good Soldier' by Ford Madox Ford again every so often. "
Ned Beauman
Good
Every
Again