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" I'd rather be the king of kids, than the prince of fools. "

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" There's nothing you can really do to prepare to rock. Do you prepare to eat a delicious meal? Are you hungry? Then you're gonna eat it. "

" We're in the dark ages if J-Lo can have a music career because of her ass. And let's face it, that's it. "

" When I was a kid, I thought I was the strongest man in the world. Then, the fastest runner and then the smartest person in the world. One by one my delusions got shut down. Now I just see myself as the lamest guy in the world. "

" I'd just like to be in films that I would like to see. "

" I played, like, a year of piano until I learned the 'Pink Panther' theme. That was my goal. Once I was good enough, I quit. Now my music has to have some rock. "

" I'm gonna drop fitty. I'm gonna drop fitty pounds. How many quarter-pounders with cheeses is that? I'm gonna drop 200 quarter-pounder with cheeses. "

" My parents were very supportive of me and my artistic endeavours. My father and mother came to every school play I ever did. "

" Push-ups, sit-ups, and a strict diet of raisins. That's my plan. "

" The real challenge is if you don't look super sexy, like a Brad Pitt, you're going to have to try harder. You're going to have to make up for it in other ways. "

" I've had so many hot, cheesy, corny loves of music in my life. I had a very intense Billy Joel period. So once you've really Joeled it up - there's some good periods of Joel; it's not all hot cheese. But I can't judge anyone else for their cheese. I've deep-sea dived in the Gouda. "

" With the acting, it's somebody else's brainchild, and I'm just sort of helping flesh it out. There's a special satisfaction to being the brains behind the operation. "

" If Beethoven and Bach hooked up with Mozart and made a band, they could be a distant runner up to The D. "

" I like being married. I'm at home with my wife and kids all the time now. I don't go out for wild nights. "

" I don't get hung up on weight. "

" I think of myself as an entertainment arsenal. Like I have my acting bazooka and my music machete. And you don't know what I'm going to come at you with. "

" When you think about rock at its origin, and you think of the Beatles and millions of kids screaming as loud as they can and running as fast as they can towards the Beatles, there's no one who is that kind of lightning rod, who commands that kind of power and has that kind of creative magma. "

" The movie Spinal Tap rocked my world. It's for rock what The Sound of Music was for hills. They really nailed how dumb rock can be. "

" Let's face it, the great comedians now that are handicapped in the looks department are tremendous writers. "

" I don't have any real spirituality in my life - I'm kind of an atheist - but when music can take me to the highest heights, it's almost like a spiritual feeling. It fills that void for me. "

" There's something about a divorce in that even if your parents still love you, the fact that they can't live with each other makes you feel there's something wrong with you. "

" Back in the '70s, like one of my favorite movies ever was 'The Bad News Bears', and that was a kids' movie, but I don't think of it that way. I think of it as just a great movie because Walter Matthau was so funny and so harsh with those kids. "

" I just remember the early days of Tenacious D. There was no talk or thought about doing a TV show or a movie. "