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" If somebody tells you that you have ears like a donkey, pay no attention. But if two people tell you so, buy yourself a saddle. "

Sholom Aleichem

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" A cantor, when he starts singing, it's like rain - once it starts, it's hard to stop. "

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" When you die, others who think they know you, will concoct things about you... Better pick up a pen and write it yourself, for you know yourself best. "

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" Playing nuts is a game like any other, neither better than tops, nor worse than cards. The game is played in various ways. There are 'holes' and 'bank' and 'caps.' But every game finishes up in the same way. One boy loses, another wins. And, as always, he who wins is a clever fellow, a smart fellow, a good fellow. "

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" You can take a Jew out of a shtetl, but you cannot take a shtetl out of a Jew. "

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" To go to the synagogue with one's father on the Passover eve - is there in the world a greater pleasure than that? What is it worth to be dressed in new clothes from head to foot, and to show off before one's friends? Then the prayers themselves - the first Festival evening prayer and blessing. "

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" The rich swell up with pride, the poor from hunger. "

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" No matter how bad things get you got to go on living, even if it kills you. "

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" A real pleasure is a pleasure that one enjoys by one's self, without a companion, and without a single argument. "

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" When have you ever heard of a cantor or any artist turning anyone down when he is strongly urged to perform? "

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" One cannot live on potatoes alone. It is said that one wants bread with potatoes. And when there's no bread, a Jew takes his stick, and goes through the village in search of business. "

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" Ah, how many luxuries has the good God prepared for his Jewish children. "

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" It is an old custom amongst Jewish children, to become war-like on the 'L'ag Beomer.' They arm themselves from head to foot with wooden swords, pop-guns and bows and arrows. They take food with them, and go off to wage war. "

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" I will never permit myself to give in to American taste and lower the standards of art. "

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" A bachelor is a man who comes to work each morning from a different direction. "

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" Life is a dream for the wise, a game for the fool, a comedy for the rich, a tragedy for the poor. "

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" They say that children become men, and men become children. Many generations have grown up, become men, and gone hence. "

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" Remember, you must not sleep at the Seder. If you do, Elijah the Prophet will come with a bag on his shoulders. On the two first nights of Passover, Elijah the Prophet goes about looking for those who have fallen asleep at the Seder, and takes them away in his bag. "

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" Here lies a plain and simple Jew who wrote in plain and simple prose. "

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" There are people who have never been taught anything, and know everything, have never been anywhere, and understand everything, have never given a moment's thought to anything, and comprehend everything. 'Blessed hands' is the name bestowed on these fortunate beings. The world envies, honours and respects them. "

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" Gossip is nature's telephone. "

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" No one knows whom the shoe pinches - no one. "

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