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" I've got four dogs, and I just don't do dog doo. I'm a diva when it comes to that. "

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" It's hard for me to grasp the concept of somebody being nervous when I'm talking to them. "

" I'm not the most patient of people. "

" Christmas morning, I'm going to open presents with my kids. I'm going to take pictures of them opening the presents. Then I'm going to come to the Staples Center and get ready to work. "

" What people see on court is another side of me; it's not me. "

" You want me to own a team and deal with these rich, spoiled stubborn athletes, and try to get them to perform? No thank you. "

" If there were camera phones back in the day, the biggest athletes in the world would have had a lot of explaining to do. "

" If you're afraid to fail, then you're probably going to fail. "

" I like playing for the purple and gold. This is where I want to finish up. "

" Everything negative - pressure, challenges - is all an opportunity for me to rise. "

" It's disgusting, but my father taught me when your mouth gets dry, just suck the sweat out of your own jersey. There's no bravado to any of it; it's just a disgusting little trick. "

" I love going one-on-one with someone. That's what I do. I've never lost. It's a whole different game, just to have them right in front of you and be able to do whatever you want. "

" I can't relate to lazy people. We don't speak the same language. I don't understand you. I don't want to understand you. "

" Can I jump over two or three guys like I used to? No. Am I as fast as I used to be? No, but I still have the fundamentals and smarts. That's what enables me to still be a dominant player. As a kid growing up, I never skipped steps. I always worked on fundamentals because I know athleticism is fleeting. "

" At the end of 2003, my game was complete. Shooting, defense, using the dribble, transition, midrange stuff was all there. Then it was about fine-tuning and trying to improve in each area. "

" Pooper scooper? Yeah, I've done it a few times. Every once in a while, you have to. "

" The Black Mamba collection of watches is me: It is my alter ego, so to speak. As I mentioned before, it is sharp, cutting edge and sleek which are characteristics I try to apply when I'm out there on the basketball court. "

" Magic has five championships. I have five championships. I'm pretty sure we both know what we're doing. "

" I focus on one thing and one thing only - that's trying to win as many championships as I can. "

" The only thing I'm afraid of is bees. I don't like bees. I'm allergic to them. "

" I'm chasing perfection. "

" Eeew, I'd be a little uncomfortable Googling myself. People sit there - and Google themselves? That's kind of weird. "

" The topic of leadership is a touchy one. A lot of leaders fail because they don't have the bravery to touch that nerve or strike that chord. Throughout my years, I haven't had that fear. "

" I've played with IVs before, during and after games. I've played with a broken hand, a sprained ankle, a torn shoulder, a fractured tooth, a severed lip, and a knee the size of a softball. I don't miss 15 games because of a toe injury that everybody knows wasn't that serious in the first place. "

" If I panic, everyone else panics. "

" There's been a lot of talk of me being a one-man show but that's simply not the case. We win games when I score 40 points and we've won when I score 10. "

" Everyone looks at your watch and it represents who you are, your values and your personal style. "

" I have self-doubt. I have insecurity. I have fear of failure. I have nights when I show up at the arena and I'm like, 'My back hurts, my feet hurt, my knees hurt. I don't have it. I just want to chill.' We all have self-doubt. You don't deny it, but you also don't capitulate to it. You embrace it. "

" We all know what flopping is when we see it. The stuff that you see is where guys aren't really getting hit at all and are just flailing around like a fish out of water. "

" I'm more than comfortable just sitting back and scoring 21, 22 points or whatever and getting 10, 11 assists whatever the case might be. More than comfortable with that. It's just a matter of the pieces that you have around you and what you can do to elevate everybody else. "

" I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. No matter what the injury - unless it's completely debilitating - I'm going to be the same player I've always been. I'll figure it out. I'll make some tweaks, some changes, but I'm still coming. "