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" Nearly everything I do is part of a master plan to make me the most important entertainer in the world. "

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" If you don't try, if you don't do something for yourself, you won't get anywhere. "

" I've done a lot of things and I've been a lot of people, but now I've come to realize who I am. "

" Who am I that I have to sing under an umbrella? These people are my fans, and if they can stand in the rain to hear me sing, I can stand in the rain. "

" Maybe I should quit the business. There's no one left for me to love. Mama's dead. Mr. Burns couldn't care less about me. What's left? "

" My family comes first. Maybe that's what makes me different from other guys. "

" This marriage is no one's business but our own. "

" It happens to the best of them. You lay off singing and your throat gets out of practice. No excuses. I blew it. "

" The sex element is the most important in the business. You must sell sex. "

" My philosophy is to take one day at a time. I don't worry about the future. Tomorrow is even out of sight for me. "

" Mr. Burns comes out and flips cigar ashes on his shoes, and makes up about 90 percent of what you hear. "

" The Democratic Party of California is ready to sponsor me. All I have to do is find the right office to run for. "

" Show me any top entertainer or top business executive, and I'll show you a guy who has mapped out his life from the very start. "

" You're either sexy or you're not. I'm very self-conscious about my physiognomy. "

" Any fool knows that bravado is always a cover-up for insecurity. That's the truth. And on that note, I'll say goodnight. God love you. "

" My goal is to be remembered as a human being and as a great performer. "

" I am now a turtle. Virtually everything I own is on my back and suffice it to say I am one ton lighter and therefore 2,000 pounds happier. All houses are gone. "

" When I come out and sing the first few bars of Bill Bailey, it's very exciting. "

" There are certain times I don't want my picture taken. If my wife's stepping out of a car and it looks like it's going to come out an indecent picture, don't I have a right to object? "

" It isn't true that you live only once. You only die once. You live lots of times, if you know how. "

" Mr. Burns is a father symbol to me, and you can omit the word symbol. "

" My entire life has been a lie. "

" Sure my career means a hell of a lot, but it will never come before Sandy and my son. "

" Just call me a family man and an actor who digs his whole scene, side interests and all. Just say I feel mighty good at the ripe old age of 27. "

" I'm more married to Sandy now than when we were married with the legal document. We're still married as parents. "