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" The No. 1 thing I am earnestly attracted to is intelligence. "

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" I had a relationship where we found out each other's Facebook passwords and would check each other's messages. That's not healthy. "

" When we're obsessed with someone, it's never about them. It's about us hating ourselves. And that's generally the tone of a lot of my videos, which is this desperate character who's overcompensating with being super happy. But she's broken. "

" All I listened to until age 18 growing up was musical theater. I liked the escapism of it. "

" It's understandable why TV hasn't been diverse because a lot of TV writers are white dudes from Harvard. And white dudes from Harvard aren't going to immediately want to write about trans issues. They're not immediately going to want to write about a Filipino family. "

" My standards are based on shows I like, like 'Girls' or 'Arrested Development.' And they're all shows that are groundbreaking. I guess in the back of my head, I think, If you're not being groundbreaking, then what are you doing? If you're not being ballsy and honest and vulgar, then what are you doing? "

" Musical theater is an American genre. It started really, in America, as a combination of jazz and operetta; most of the great musical theater writers in the golden era are American. I think that to do a musical is a very American thing to me. "

" I was made fun of a lot in middle school. When I was in seventh grade, the popular kids paid the most popular guy to ask me out. "

" Most of my stuff hasn't gone viral. I have been successful on YouTube and I'm very proud of the stuff that I've done, but compared to the people who are actual internet stars and making a living off of it, my views are nothing. "

" I think in a lot of network television, everyone's vaguely Protestant and doesn't really go to church so they can be 'relatable.' "

" Jewish, black, Filipino, whatever the specificity is, it's specificity that makes a good story. And I think people are tired of seeing the same old shtick on network television. It's just a group of white people hanging out talking about their jobs. Who cares? We've seen that. "

" I grew up in Southern California, and I particularly did not fit in. I always felt like a fish out of water in my hometown because everyone was very happy, and I was thinking about death and anxiety, and not many other people around me seemed to be thinking about that. "

" It's double talk and double standards. It's like, be honest, but don't be too honest. Look fresh-faced and young, but don't tell us how you got there. God forbid you have plastic surgery, even though we're telling you, 'Oh, you look old.' Be a career woman, but also, why aren't you having kids? Are you some kind of cold shrew? "

" I like deconstructing things. I like cutting the legs out from under something that feels secret. "

" For lack of a better word, I've let love and infatuation emasculate me. "

" We're told all the time to give up everything for love. That's the Western notion of what love is - love conquers all, all you need is love. And there are so many different kinds of outside, conflicting pressures on women. "

" I'm a comedian, and I have my share of anxiety and depression; so do most of my friends. My humor tends to lie in the juxtaposition of extreme lightness - I'm a huge musical-theater fan - and extreme darkness. And so I really like playing with those because that's how I feel. "

" Only children are weird. The only children I know, including myself, are either superweird or very talented and special or a mix of the two. I think there was always a certain independence and loneliness - I had a lot of imaginary friends as a kid. "

" The effort of every time I put out a video, it was like, 'Okay, I've got to put it on my Facebook, I've got to put it on my website, what's the view count now? What's the view count now? What's the view count now?' You get obsessive with it. "

" I have noticed when you get a bunch of dudes in a room together, and you just have one woman or two women, the dudes will bro out. And the woman won't get heard. "

" While actors are great and awesome, writers literally create new worlds from scratch. What is sexier than that? Personally, I don't know why every last person out there isn't dating a writer. "

" When I graduated, I was director of my school's sketch comedy group, and I knew that I wanted to be writing and performing my own sketch comedy. It kind of made me want to do my own one-person sketch group. "

" For myself, the way that I learned comedy was doing it live for four years, and only after doing sketch for four years did I feel confident enough to be like, 'Okay, I feel good about starting to put stuff on the Internet where it lives forever.' As opposed to one time at a college sketch show where it bombs and we never speak of it again. "

" I was doing these music videos online for a couple years, and they'd be doing well to varying degrees. And I released an album, and with the album, I released three new music videos, and one of them was featured on Jezebel. "

" I was kind of an unhappy kid. I always felt like a cynical New Yorker trapped in a little kid's body. I started to get some pretty bad anxiety disorders around puberty, which totally did not work with growing up a mile away from the beach. I started cutting my own hair. "