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" When I was a lad in my 20s, as carefree and debonair as any other underpaid newspaperman, I happened to be a golfer who could flirt with par fairly often, and I was adventurous enough in those days to play any known or unknown thief who showed up at Goat Hills for whatever amount he fancied. "

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" The golf ball has no sense at all, which is why it has to be given stern lectures constantly, especially during the act of putting. "

Dan Jenkins

Golf

Sense

Why

" The reason I wrote about women's golf is because I've helped out some with the Kathy Whitworth Cup, a tournament they have in Fort Worth every year where they invite 60 of the best junior golfers in the country and even some foreign players. "

" Tiger Woods was a month away from 34 years of age when his debutantes began turning up in the news. He was a grown man with a wife and two children. Well, we supposed he had a wife, but that was before we learned she was only an ornament. "

" I like to be entertained, not smothered with 'literary' riddles. "

Dan Jenkins

Literary

Riddles

" There have been so many great moments in golf that you even forget some of them. "

" It must be the PGA Championship if it's August and you can sit down and talk to the heat or reach inside your shirt, where it's 110 degrees, and grab handfuls of humidity. "

" Nobody can make a putt that breaks to the right. It's unnatural. Unless you're left-handed, of course. Standing over a putt that breaks to the right can actually make you dizzy. I've long thought that right-breaking putts are a major contributor to mental and physical ill health. "

" My aunt got me interested in journalism - she found an old typewriter, had it worked over, put it on the dining room table, gave me a stack of paper and said, 'Play like you're a writer.' "

" I don't cover golf tournaments anymore - I preside over them. "

" Nobody else is Tiger Woods. Not on this planet. "

" All I've ever done is try to get at the truth of the matter. "

" I'd rather be doing something than not doing something. "

" Vijay Singh won a playoff in 2004 at Whistling Straits after a final-round 76, which was the highest last round by the winner of any major since 1938, when Reg Whitcombe won the British Open with a 78 in a storm that blew down the exhibition tent at Sandwich. "

" A sportswriter's life means never sitting with your wife or family at the games. Still working after everyone has gone to the party... Digging beneath a coach's lies, not to forget those of athletic directors and general managers and owners of pro teams. Keeping a confidence. Risking it. "

" Golf is 90% mental. Once you know how to hold the club, swing it, it's all in the mind. "

" In a story, you have to have a theme and an angle, you have to have a beginning, middle and an end. You have to have a defining moment and kick it to death. You gotta be able to recognize that, by the way. It probably takes experience. "

" I've worked my whole life and never missed a deadline. "

" Here's all I know about Dubai: It's one of those somewhere-over-there places where they make sand. "

" Fort Worth is friendly; it's still a Texas town. It's the most Texas city in Texas. "

" You must remind yourself at all times that the golf ball is nothing. It's an object. It's something to be swatted and sometimes lost and not even looked for. "

" You can't have a U.S. Open anymore without an extra course to store all the hospitality tents. I used to be able to drive up to the clubhouse and park like the players. Now, there are seven corporate hospitality guys who have my spot, and I'm on a bus. "

" The PGA Championship, last of the majors each year, might well be accustomed to having fun poked at it by the print press for being mired in August, but this isn't fair. "

" I'd follow Ben Hogan and Byron Nelson anywhere. "

Dan Jenkins

Ben

Anywhere

" Valet parking is an essential at any decent club. "