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" You know when Jerry Ford gets the best joke, you know you're in trouble. "

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" I believe that Bill Clinton's second term will be good for business... my business! "

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" If the audience doesn't like it, usually they're just silent. But they've never all walked out at once. "

" You know that a given in life in human nature, is that at a sporting event, a baseball game, a football game, you never introduce a politician, is because he'll be booed. I don't care if he's the most beloved person in the world, its part of the game. "

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" Humor is very very risky, particularly for a candidate, unless he's been in so long that it just doesn't matter, and he's not running for president. But it's just that people are so sensitive and so touchy, and you're just going to upset somebody without ever realizing it. "