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" You know you're in your 40s when you've spent 48 hours trying to think of a word, and that word was 'hemorrhoids.' "

Pamela Druckerman

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" Parisiennes rarely walk around wearing the giant diamonds that are de rigueur in certain New York neighborhoods. "

Pamela Druckerman

" Soon after Donald Trump was inaugurated, I got a letter from France's interior ministry informing me that I was now French. By the time it arrived, I'd been French for nearly two weeks without even knowing it. "

Pamela Druckerman

" A lot of French comedy is satire. "

Pamela Druckerman

" I've been vacationing in western North Carolina and northern Georgia since I was a kid. I arrive, marvel at the mountains, and put on an unconvincing Southern drawl. "

Pamela Druckerman

" The French don't think everyone should have the same bank balance, but they're offended by extremes of inequality. "

Pamela Druckerman

" In the English books, the American kids' books, typically, there is a problem, the characters grapple with that problem, and the problem is resolved. "

Pamela Druckerman

" There's this idea in America that you can be whatever you want. That remains an ideal in terms of how you dress too - when you go shopping, you try on all possible selves and then decide. "

Pamela Druckerman

" Being an immigrant mother can be hard, but being a poor immigrant mother is much harder. You don't generally get to sit in cafes polishing your French by reading 'Le Monde.' "

Pamela Druckerman

" When you're the foreigner and your kids are the natives, they realize you're clueless much sooner than they ordinarily would. I'm pretty sure mine skipped the Mommy-is-infallible stage entirely. "

Pamela Druckerman

" I gradually understood why European mothers aren't in perpetual panic about their work-life balance and don't write books about how executive moms should just try harder: Their governments are helping them - and doing it competently. "

Pamela Druckerman

" When you're further along in your career, you probably have more money and more means; you have to stop yourself from giving your child too much. Whereas, if you're in twenties, you might just get by. "

Pamela Druckerman

" The main thing my bookcase says about me is that I'm not French. "

Pamela Druckerman

" Get rid of the idea of kids' food. Kids can eat whatever adults can eat. You know, there is one dinner, and everyone has the same thing. "

Pamela Druckerman

" I was scared to say I was in my 40s because at that point, it sounded really old, and to out myself as a middle-aged human - I felt very awkward about it. "

Pamela Druckerman

" French schools follow a national curriculum that includes arduous surveys of French philosophy and literature. Frenchmen then spend the rest of their lives quoting Proust to one another, with hardly anyone else catching the references. "

Pamela Druckerman

" I've gotten used to being a foreigner. "

Pamela Druckerman

" The whole point of a commencement speech is to say something encouraging. "

Pamela Druckerman

" I'm not an early adopter. I'll only start wearing new styles of clothing once they're practically out of date, and I won't move into a neighborhood until it's fully saturated with upscale coffee shops. "

Pamela Druckerman

" Here's some news you might find surprising: By and large, the French like Jews. "

Pamela Druckerman

" Unlike the time sink of binge-watching a TV series, podcasts actually made me more efficient. Practically every dull activity - folding laundry, applying makeup - became tolerable when I did it while listening to a country singer describing his hardscrabble childhood, or a novelist defending her open marriage. "

Pamela Druckerman

" I'm always hoping no one is following me around with a camera. "

Pamela Druckerman

" When my mother in Florida mentions that she's off to play golf, I think: Golf? In the age of Trump? "

Pamela Druckerman

" In the Nineties, there was all this new research into brain development, with evidence saying poor kids fall behind in school because no one is talking to them at home, no one is reading to them. And middle-class parents seized on this research. "

Pamela Druckerman

" Early childhood offerings vary, but everywhere in Europe and in Canada, they're far more generous than in the United States. Ukrainian dads may not change enough diapers, but their government offers paid maternity leave; practically free preschool; and per-baby payments equivalent to eight months of an average salary. "

Pamela Druckerman

" Optimism - even, and perhaps especially in the face of difficulty - has long been an American hallmark. "

Pamela Druckerman

" My husband is so upset by President Trump's scapegoating of immigrants and Muslims, he refuses to even visit the United States. "

Pamela Druckerman

" Not many foreigners move to Paris for their dream job. Many do it on a romantic whim. "

Pamela Druckerman

" When my kids correct my cultural missteps, I sometimes suspect that they're not embarrassed, they're gleeful. "

Pamela Druckerman

" Where Americans might coo over a child's most inane remark to boost his confidence, middle-class French parents teach their kids to be concise and amusing, to keep everyone listening. "

Pamela Druckerman

" Having lived in America and France, I've been on both sides of the picky-eating divide. "

Pamela Druckerman