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" You're not ethnic enough. You're not fat enough. You're not thin enough. You're not blond enough. You're not dark enough. You're not young enough. You're not old enough. "

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" We were so unprepared that when my husband took off to get groceries, and we'd adopted a 3-year-old, he came back with baby formula, a steak and a teething ring. We had no idea what we were doing. But you learn. There's no way to fully prepare. Just eyes wide open - jump. "

Nia Vardalos

Jump

Baby

Doing

" We would not have 'America's Funniest Home Videos' without drunk brides and grooms falling into cakes. "

" I have found that every family has a strange remedy for any situation - from 'Use Fantastic to get the scuff off your patent leather shoes!' to 'Soak an aspirin in a glass of water to get rid of a migraine.' "

" I've had designers say to my face, 'Oh, I want to dress you now that you're skinny.' And that's really rude. "

" There's this constant guilt that comes with parenting. You always feel like you're never enough. If you're confident in your parenting, you probably suck at it. "

" I think it's probably a universal experience that all parents think they're not hovering, but perhaps we all are. "

" I believe that if I come home from a stressful day on the set, I just have to leave it there. "

" When I write something, I constantly rewrite. "

" You can spend an entire summer in Europe, and no one will ask you what you do for a living. "

" My New Year's Resolution List usually starts with the desire to lose between ten and three thousand pounds. "

" I grew up looking for myself onscreen and never could find myself. And I believe that I am supposed to be Toula to show people that it's O.K. to be different. "

" Because I am a character actor, I thought I would be the fourth or eighth banana on a sitcom, and that would be OK. "

" I think there is a moment in every parent's life where we realize that we have lost ourselves a little bit. It's a moment of looking in the mirror and going, 'I need to put on some lipstick.' "

" When I wanted to go away to college in Toronto, my dad said, 'You can't go.' When I got to Toronto, I bought a couch, and my dad cried for the whole weekend because, as my mum told me, 'Now you have furniture; he knows you are never coming back.' "

Nia Vardalos

You

Weekend

" I love romance. I think our skin clears up and we're nicer when you are in love. "

Nia Vardalos

Romance

You

" Let's face it: Russell Crowe is fat and no one ever talks about it. "

" The white hot publicity that came from 'My Big Fat Greek Wedding' was appreciated but not sought, so I was happy to walk away from it and then write. "

" Every time I sign a contract, I donate something to charity and buy a piece of jewelry. Whether the movie gets made or not, it's a celebration. "

" I write through improvisation. I never card out a movie. You know how people will outline or card? I don't do that. I tend to start with an idea and go. "

" Lately, I've been in meetings regarding a new script idea I have. A studio executive asked me to change the female lead to a male, because... 'Women don't go to movies.' Really? "

" We absolutely have to support our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters. We just must. It's not fair that they don't get to live an authentic life. "

" On November 15th, 2008, in over 300 cities, 4,000 children were adopted in one day. "

" On the publicity tour of 'My Big Fat Greek Wedding,' I was asked over and over again, if, as the writer, I felt it was a fair depiction of real life to have someone of my er, below average looks, hook up with hottie John Corbett. "

" I think the goal is parity: I try to be pro-woman without being anti-man, and I hope and wish that men could do the same in that when they look at the screenplay, they say, 'Wait, wait, wait - is my daughter represented here, is my wife represented here? Is my sister represented?' "

" I believe that there are moments in everyone's lives where a door flings open, and if you're terrified of what's on the other side, you must walk through it. "

" It's called show business for a reason. The theater owners want to make money, and understandably so. "

" Socially, the issue of men's weight is simply not a big deal. "

" I had worked for ten years in theater; I had worked at Second City in Chicago. Then I got to Hollywood, and I was like, naively, 'Where's my pilot?' "

Nia Vardalos

City

Pilot

" If you create a fun environment, people will take liberties and grow and expand. And then you'll get your final screenplay in my favorite style, which is 'tossed away' - as if the actor just thought of it. "

" We must make choices that are outside of the familial expectations of us, or we'll just be repeating the mistakes. Our parents came here to give us better choices. "