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" Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime. "

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" If by chance some day you're not feeling well and you should remember some silly thing I've said or done and it brings back a smile to your face or a chuckle to your heart, then my purpose as your clown has been fulfilled. "

" Our principles are the springs of our actions. Our actions, the springs of our happiness or misery. Too much care, therefore, cannot be taken in forming our principles. "

" No matter what your heartache may be, laughing helps you forget it for a few seconds. "

" All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner. "

" I personally believe we were put here to build and not to destroy. "

" Exercise? I get it on the golf course. When I see my friends collapse, I run for the paramedics. "

" I left home because I was hungry. "

" God's children and their happiness are my reasons for being. "

" Congress: Bingo with billions. "

" Live by this credo: have a little laugh at life and look around you for happiness instead of sadness. Laughter has always brought me out of unhappy situations. "

" His death was the first time that Ed Wynn ever made anyone sad. "