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" As a Middle Eastern male, when you're in a Chuck Norris movie of the week, you know you're going to die. "
Maz Jobrani
Die
Going
Know
Related Quotes:
" I wish more Americans would travel here. I always encourage my friends: 'Travel. See the Middle East. There's so much to see, so many good people.' And it's vice versa, and it helps stop problems of misunderstanding and stereotypes from happening. "
Maz Jobrani
People
Friends
Good
" I tend not to make fun of religious groups anywhere I play. "
Maz Jobrani
Play
Fun
Anywhere
" Trump is good for comedy but bad for the world. "
Maz Jobrani
Comedy
Bad
World
" I've made enough jokes about Iran's leadership that I'm sure if I showed up that I would get a nice escort - to the main prison - and then I could do a show there. "
Maz Jobrani
Nice
Enough
Jokes
" I've always had a foot in everything. As a kid, I was active in sports and theater. Now, I'm learning I have to focus a bit. I'm trying to get to next projects, like writing a screenplay. Once that comes together, I could put my mind to another book - maybe a fun kids' book. "
Maz Jobrani
Book
Together
Sports
" Follow your heart. Do what you love. Because I was constantly struggling with that. If it's in your heart, go for it. Don't listen to other people. "
Maz Jobrani
Heart
Love
Do What You Love
" Anyone who's gotten their passport in America will tell you, when you get it, it still says what country you were born in. So I remember getting my American passport. I was like, 'Woo-hoo! I'm going to travel.' And I opened it up. It said, 'Born in Iran.' I'm like, 'Oh, come on, man!' "
Maz Jobrani
America
Man
Remember
" I took one acting class as an undergrad, and I loved it. I was in a very avant-garde play at UCLA about a closeted, married homosexual. I played his father. "
Maz Jobrani
Class
Play
Acting
" Definitely in the West, we're all cast as the same now. Whether you're Indian, Pakistani, Arab, Iranian, Afghan or whatever, you just get thrown into this category. And nine times out of 10, you're depicted as bad. "
Maz Jobrani
Now
Bad
Same
" When I told my parents I wanted to be an actor, my mom was, like, 'I think I heard you say lawyer.' "
Maz Jobrani
Say
Think
Lawyer
" Comedy comes from tragedy, and being Iranian in America from 1979 on had been quite tragic. In stand-up comedy, I was able to take the reality and exaggerate it. "
Maz Jobrani
America
Reality
Take
" People think just because I'm from the Middle East, I'm an expert on the Middle East. So, like, I got a friend, like, any time the gas prices go up, he'll always ask my opinion about it. "
Maz Jobrani
Opinion
Think
Go
" You have to laugh at yourself. I do a lot of humor about all ethnicities that are at the show - Latinos, Asians, Indians... What I say is, 'We're laughing together. I'm laughing with you, not at you.' Never say, 'Oh, I'm better than you.' "
Maz Jobrani
Together
Laugh
Better
" The fact is, there's good people everywhere. That's what I try and show in my stand-up: good people everywhere. All it takes is one person to mess it up. "
Maz Jobrani
People
Person
Try
" I would say that while most Muslims take offense at the portrayal of the Prophet Muhammad in cartoons, they would never resort to violence. It is a minority of extremist Muslims who take such actions, and they do it for political and tactical reasons far beyond just being offended. "
Maz Jobrani
Beyond
Say
Political
" I saw the discrimination that was happening towards Middle Easterners, Muslims and other brown people who had nothing to do with 9/11. It suddenly felt like a duty of mine to talk about some of the crazy things that were going on and make fun of how stupid it was. "
Maz Jobrani
Crazy
Stupid
People
" I am a standup comedian who has performed comedy in the Middle East in front of thousands of Muslims. And believe it or not, they laughed at plenty, especially when we poked fun at local culture. The Lebanese loved it when you would make fun of their driving and how, in Lebanon, a red light is just a suggestion to stop. "
Maz Jobrani
Light
Red
I Am
" I want to show another side of Middle Easterners. My hope is that I would be able to play a variety of parts, and not always be the guy with the accent. "
Maz Jobrani
Show
Variety
Always
" One of the jobs of comedy is to expose hypocrisy. When you look at countries like Iran or North Korea that don't have freedom of speech, we who do should push it as far as we need to. "
Maz Jobrani
Look
Freedom
Freedom Of Speech
" I thought, 'Oh, acting is going to be great - I get to play different parts.' And then these auditions started coming up for terrorist, terrorist, terrorist, and I'm going, 'Whoa, what's this about?' "
Maz Jobrani
Different
Great
Play
" One thing about D.C. that's funny to me is that you end up running into famous political figures who you've seen on television who you think are not real until you see them. "
Maz Jobrani
End
Famous
Funny
" I don't consider myself an Iranian comedian; I consider myself a comedian who happens to be of Iranian descent. "
Maz Jobrani
Happens
Comedian
Consider
" Coming from L.A. to D.C., I'm always impressed that in D.C., people are doing the things that the people in L.A. are pretending to do. Whenever I'm in D.C., I ask people what they do, and they say, 'I'm with the agency, or I'm with State.' In L.A., I ran into a guy who said, 'I'm working on an audition for a guy who happens to be with an agency.' "
Maz Jobrani
Ask
Say
Said
" Racism has always existed, and a big part of it is people just not knowing others. I think humans change other human's minds, and it's hard for someone in the middle of America to hate Syrian refugees if they've been able to befriend them. "
Maz Jobrani
Racism
Change
Hate
" A cultural thing that is funny to me is that every time I go out in D.C. after a show, all the nightclubs and restaurants are owned by Iranians and Afghans. It's funny to me how we lost our countries but we gained the nightlife. "
Maz Jobrani
Time
Funny
Go
" You know the Middle East is going crazy when Lebanon is the most peaceful place in the region. "
Maz Jobrani
You
Peaceful
Know
" The first time I performed at the Comedy Store in Los Angeles, I was in the back of the room doing vocal exercises. 'Me-me-me, my-my-my, mo-mo-mo.' And I'm looking around, and no one else is doing it. I'm like, 'They must have done it before they came to the club.' I came to realize that I was an idiot. "
Maz Jobrani
Back
Comedy
Done
" Once you start listening to the comics, be they Jewish, Muslim, Italian, Filipino or whatever, the material often springs from the same source - the overbearing mom, the parents who want you to marry from within your community. That's why the 'Ethnic Show' works so well. "
Maz Jobrani
Parents
Community
Listening
" I quickly came to realize that in the Middle East, God is God, and in the West, the sponsor is God - or, as I like to say, Tide detergent is God. "
Maz Jobrani
God
Tide
West
" My mother was very wary at first. And now she's come around 180 degrees. She's, like, one of my biggest fans now. Like, she'll come over to my house, and she'll be like, 'OK, listen. I need two T-shirts from the comedy show, and give me three DVDs. The neighbors are asking for them.' "
Maz Jobrani
Me
She
Comedy