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" I am a deeply superficial person. "

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" I want to die with my blue jeans on. "

" Before I was shot, I always thought that I was more half-there than all-there - I always suspected that I was watching TV instead of living life. Right when I was being shot and ever since, I knew that I was watching television. "

" Employees make the best dates. You don't have to pick them up and they're always tax-deductible. "

" Don't pay any attention to what they write about you. Just measure it in inches. "

" I always hear myself saying, 'She's a beauty!' or 'He's a beauty!' or 'What a beauty!' but I never know what I'm talking about. "

" I think kids should go to high school until they're 30. No, really, because people are staying younger now and there's nothing to do. If you stayed longer, then it would be really great. "

" I've decided something: Commercial things really do stink. As soon as it becomes commercial for a mass market it really stinks. "

" Land really is the best art. "

" Art is what you can get away with. "

" Everyone needs a fantasy. "

" People sometimes say the way things happen in the movies is unreal, but actually, it's the way things happen to you in life that's unreal. "

" I want to be a machine. "

" I always wished I had died, and I still wish that, because I could have gotten the whole thing over with. "

" Dying is the most embarrassing thing that can ever happen to you, because someone's got to take care of all your details. "

" I think they should have movies in restaurants. I can't believe that so many people get together just to sit there. It's so abstract... isn't it abstract? What are these people sitting here watching? "

" It would be very glamorous to be reincarnated as a great big ring on Liz Taylor's finger. "

" I think Chris Burden is terrific. I really do. "

" When you think about it, department stores are kind of like museums. "

" Isn't life a series of images that change as they repeat themselves? "

" I never think that people die. They just go to department stores. "

" Fantasy love is much better than reality love. "

" If you're not trying to be real, you don't have to get it right. That's art. "

" I'm bored with that line. I never use it anymore. My new line is 'In 15 minutes everybody will be famous.' "

" An artist is somebody who produces things that people don't need to have. "

" I always thought I'd like my own tombstone to be blank. No epitaph, and no name. Well, actually, I'd like it to say 'figment.' "

" Sociological critics are waste makers. "

" I love Los Angeles, and I love Hollywood. They're beautiful. Everybody's plastic, but I love plastic. I want to be plastic. "

" I used to think that everything was just being funny but now I don't know. I mean, how can you tell? "

" I've been invited to the White House about five times. I think the greatest thing would be if they actually invited everybody to the White House every night... they'd just take about 500 people a night. Everybody would just love this country because it's so thrilling to go there. It really is. "