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" I had started writing for 'Sports Illustrated,' which was really my dream job growing up. But the writing probably read like I was auditioning to write for 'Letterman' or '70s-era Carson. "
Steve Rushin
Job
Growing Up
Dream
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" I'm a product of the 1970s. "
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1970s
" I've been to all seven continents on assignment for 'SI.' "
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Continents
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Assignment
" The man who consumes sports to the exclusion of all other things will never be well-rounded. "
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" Hurricane Irene's advance coverage was heavy on worst-case scenarios. Thank goodness they didn't pan out. "
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" Occasionally, Americans in large numbers are moved by a vanquished athlete's grief. Larry Bird with a towel over his head in 1979 comes immediately to mind. But more often, sports fans do the opposite - they delight in the desolation of a defeated archrival. "
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Numbers
Grief
Head
" As a kid, I always had my nose buried in the side of a cereal box. "
Steve Rushin
Side
Always
Kid
" I'd never had much interest in cool cars. "
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Cool
Never
Much
" Trying to keep up is the ultimate act of uncoolness. And so I still retrieve not one but two daily newspapers from the driveway. "
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Up
Daily
Keep
" Once upon a time in America, people aspired to party like a rock star. Now, rock stars aspire to party like a football owner. "
Steve Rushin
Football
America
Stars
" I'd happily cover the British Open every year until St. Andrews slides into the sea or Scotland runs out of beer, whichever happens first. "
Steve Rushin
Open
Beer
Year
" In any other context, 'icing' is a great and exciting word: The proverbial icing on the cake, for instance, is a bonus - a wonderful thing on top of another wonderful thing. But in hockey, icing merely results in the referee's raising his right hand, as if swearing an oath to the deity of downtime. "
Steve Rushin
Right
Results
Hockey
" Humans had run barefoot for millennia, and some still preferred doing so in the modern Stone Age of the mid-20th century, when the handful of people running for exercise often wore whatever they happened to have on at the moment of inspiration. "
Steve Rushin
People
Exercise
Age
" After the abrupt death of my mother, Jane, on Sept. 5, 1991, of a disease called amyloidosis, my dad took up golf at 57. He and my mother had always played tennis - a couples' game of mixed doubles and tennis bracelets and Love-Love. But in mourning, Dad turned Job-like to golf, a game of frustration and golf widows and solitary hours on the range. "
Steve Rushin
Golf
Death
Frustration
" Growing up in Bloomington, Minn., I loved the ritual of dressing for Little League - in white socks, blue stirrups, belted pants, a double-knit jersey, and the cap I'd hold over my face to screen out mosquitoes in right field. "
Steve Rushin
Face
Growing
Growing Up
" As good as NFL Films is at making players human, it's even better at making players superhuman. No Hollywood studio has made movies that are more grand or gorgeous. Every meticulous shot of 'Hard Knocks' is a vision: every slow-motion spiral, every shaved head steaming like a Manhattan manhole cover. "
Steve Rushin
Movies
Vision
Hollywood
" At its root, 'quit' means 'to set free' - think of an acquittal in a court of law - and to quit is often to be liberated. "
Steve Rushin
Court
Think
Root
" My first interview at 'SI,' I sat in silence next to Guy LaFleur for five minutes on the New York Rangers team bus until he finally broke the ice. Those early interviews, every one of them was like a terrible first date. "
Steve Rushin
Early
Bus
Team
" You never forget your first felony. Mine was mail tampering. As a hoops-crazed 13-year-old, I rifled through a new neighbor's mailbox to confirm that the occupant of the split-level on 98 1/2 Street in Bloomington, Minn., really was former Gophers basketball star Flip Saunders. "
Steve Rushin
Never Forget
Basketball
You
" We can project just about anything we want onto NFL owners - one of them is named Arthur Blank, for heaven's sake. He's a walking Mad Lib, just waiting for us to complete him. "
Steve Rushin
Heaven
Want
Walking
" With the exception of undertakers, athletes are the only professionals obliged to feign sorrow on a daily basis, pretending that every June baseball loss is a tragedy requiring library silence in the clubhouse. "
Steve Rushin
Silence
Loss
Daily
" Grafted onto street clothes and removed from the field of play, jerseys don't even flatter men in their physical prime. Witness any baseball player wearing a uniform top over dress shirt and slacks at a press conference podium. "
Steve Rushin
Street
Clothes
Dress
" 'Uff da,' for the unenlightened, is Norwegian for 'oy vey' and is a common expression in Minnesotese. "
Steve Rushin
Expression
Norwegian
Common
" There is something inherently foolish in soldiering on when there is no hope of payoff. "
Steve Rushin
Something
Foolish
Hope
" In golf, a wedge issue means just that: You can't hit your sand wedge, or your lob wedge needs to be regrooved. In politics, a wedge issue is more serious still: It's one that splits the electorate, dividing voters along ideological fault lines. "
Steve Rushin
Politics
More
You
" Quitting has always been the worst possible thing you can do in sports. It's downright un-American. "
Steve Rushin
You
Sports
Always
" What's the best baseball name of all time? Is it Champ Summers? Clyde Kluttz? Razor Shines? Scipio Spinks? Sibby Sisti? Creepy Crespi? Before you answer, consider that Coco Crisp is not even the game's top Coco, an honor retired by Coco Laboy. "
Steve Rushin
Time
Best
Baseball
" I'm an unabashed sports photo fanboy, the kind of weirdo who seeks out the infinitesimal picture credits. "
Steve Rushin
Who
Photo
Out
" The phrase 'NFL combine' always sounds redundant, because the league is a combine harvester, reaping and threshing everything in its path. "
Steve Rushin
Everything
Always
Because
" Years ago, children helped my brother search for his lost ball at Jackson Park Golf Course in Chicago - and even offered to sell it back to him on the next tee. That entrepreneurial spirit, on the site of the 1893 World's Fair - which introduced Cracker Jacks to the United States - exemplifies America, to say nothing of American public golf. "
Steve Rushin
America
Brother
World
" LeBron will not likely win six rings. "
Steve Rushin
LeBron
Will
Likely