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" I kid my friends who are golfers, and I say, 'If you ever hear me complain, hit me in the butt with a putter' because I have no reason to complain. Even on days when you don't like what you see in the paper, I have no reason to complain. "

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" My mother is a strong woman. Her strength comes from being tested by life's unpredictability. It comes from soldiering on for her children, even when she might rather have given up. I know it hasn't always come easily, but I also know it's her greatest gift. "

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" There are some harsh realities about this business, and they've been beaten into my psyche. But I'm more of an optimist than a pessimist. "

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" Does anyone want to see a person who's making the money that the newspapers say I'm making complaining, 'Woe is me, my life is terrible, and people are being unfair?' No one would've had any patience for that. I wouldn't have any patience for that. "

" If I feel like I've done a great job during an interview with the president of the United States live in the Oval Office, it doesn't give me a tenth of the good feeling of going to the school play and making eye contact with my kids as they're onstage delivering their lines. Nothing compares with that moment of connection. "

" When you get your dream job, you'd be really hard-pressed to leave it. Unless you've got another dream job out there. "

" I am the luckiest guy I know. "

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" Outside of my family and my work, I have two passions, both instilled in me by my father: golf and fishing. "

" My dad taught me how to fish. When I am stand in a trout stream now, and I have the waders on, and I've got a fly rod in my hand, or I am fishing for bass, I think of sitting in a boat with my dad. How can that be a bad experience? "

" In my mind, I am extraordinarily handy. But what that means is when I attempt to fix something, there's usually a five-minute period of experimentation, followed by a five-minute period of frustration, followed by a frantic phone call to a professional. "

" I like it when things are where they're supposed to be. "

" I was always more interested in asking people about themselves than I was telling them about me. "

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" The Iraqis have once again failed to meet a deadline for a final draft of the constitution. "

" I'm lucky: I have very funny kids. "

" If I buy something new - a piece of clothing, a tie, a shirt, a suit - something old has to go. That's the way I avoid clutter, crammed closets and drawers. It keeps things in balance, and it really works. "

" I was one of these people, especially early in my career, who balanced the equation too much in favor of my job; I spent most of my life focusing on that. But becoming a dad gave me back perspective; it brought balance into my life. "

" I learned more from my dad by osmosis than by any talk we ever had. He was the most reliable person I've ever met. "

" There was always an unspoken generosity about my mom. "

" I like getting rid of things. I really do. "

" In this business, the minute you start feeling comfortable about the show you're doing or the ratings you're getting, you're in big trouble. "

" I read the rumors, and I know there is a cottage industry of meanness out there. "

" It usually takes two people a little while to learn where the funny buttons are and testy buttons are. "

" On a day-to-day level, I love watching my kids accomplish the little things that seem trivial but are really milestones: seeing my son hit a baseball or watching my daughter draw something that actually looks like what she says she's drawing. Or hearing them say 'I love you.' "

" I don't think it's a healthy thing in your personal life to go around with that never-sure attitude. "

" If you can be who you are on camera, which is not easy, then I think you're going to be successful. "

" Every night at 6:30, my entire family sits down for dinner together. It's definitely the best part of my day. "

" There are pockets of liberal, affluent America where parents don't want their kids vaccinated. "

" People don't want to see me having a bad morning. They have job problems, financial problems, family pressures, kids to get off to school. The last thing they want to wake up to is someone showing them the same problems. So maybe that's the one time I am forced to act. "

" I don't find anything comes out of getting in someone's face during an interview and screaming. "

" I've always liked the idea of walking into a cocktail party where there are different people and finding some connection with almost everybody in the room. "

" Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two but can't remember what they are. "