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" I want to see Brian Williams with no irony wearing a mustache. "

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" I hired a personal trainer to help me lose 25 pounds and get from obese to fat. My next step will be to get from fat to chubby. "

" The easiest time to be funny is during a fairly serious situation. That way, you can break the ice. It's crazy, but even at funerals, people will get huge laughs. "

" When the movie starts playing on TV and DVD, that's when you really see what the movie is. "

" There's nothing more fun than making fun of what's sacred. "

" You have a guy like Bernie Madoff literally steal $80 billion, you know, AIG steal hundreds of billions, Goldman Sachs. Crime has changed so much, and to really do a movie with, like, drug dealers or drug smugglers is kind of almost quaint at this point. "

" Creative freedom is a huge carrot. "

" I don't want to speak for my movies; you could say my movies are just completely silly and dumb, but in the case of 'Idiocracy' and 'Borat,' without a doubt there is a really subversive and sophisticated assault on American culture. "

" You know how in every heist movie they get past the security cameras that show the hallway leading to the diamonds by jamming the screens with a fake signal of everything looking safe and quiet? Usually a guard coughs so they don't notice the blip from switching to the bogus feed. "

" Sony is the coolest studio. They are really amazing. I think part of it comes from they're not an American corporation. They don't work by quite the same rules. And their studio heads have a lot of autonomy. "

" Can anything good come of a backward way of thinking like judging someone based on skin color? No way. "

" You have to be able to fail with the improv. You have to not care. "

" Since FDR's New Deal, corporations and wealthy families have been non-stop finding new ways to get tax breaks, deregulation and entitlements from the government. "

" Obamacare is a private mandate that will drive billions to the insurance industry, much like the auto insurance mandate. Hardly socialism. In fact, it was a Republican plan to begin with. "

" I'm a huge hip hop fan going way back, like, back to '83. I had my Gemini mixer listening to Run-DMC and Kurtis Blow. "

" Anyone in the comedy world knows that Horatio Sanz and Chris Parnell are two of the funniest guys around. "

" George W. Bush was a silver spoon dolt with no record to speak of other than bankruptcy and selling tropical plants, and we let him sail into the White House, but Barack talks about religious fundamentalism and guns being prevalent in poor areas, and we roast him for weeks? "

" The way you really stop Al-Qaeda is by stopping their funding. It's not by carpet-bombing or land invasions or anything. "

" It's one thing to break stuff and damage people's possessions, but when you start aiming at the ideology of America, that's dangerous comedy. "

" White-collar crime has been marketed - billions of dollars have been put in to have us be bored by it. "

" Other than Green Day, we haven't had a lot of protest music over the past few decades. "

" I don't think arrested-adolescent humor will fade. Maybe the form will change, but I guarantee its replacement will still be based in immature behavior from mature figures. "

" The corporate right fires up the religious right against gay marriage and abortion and uses their votes to push their deregulation and tax cuts for the rich. It's an old trick. The House of Saud has the same arrangement with the Mullahs in Saudi Arabia. "

" Nothing is funnier than confidently doing the wrong thing. "

" There's nothing more fun to me than new characters and a new world. "