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" If I had more time, I'd watch more woodworking or home-improvement shows, but, not enough hours in the day. "

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" When I got my job on 'Parks,' it was so dreamy, kind of unfathomable. I didn't think a job that excellent could exist for me. "

" I'm very hairy, and men in film and TV are no longer allowed to be hairy. "

" I've never seen a theater community to rival that of Chicago. Neither New York nor L.A. has the raw talent or integrity that Chicago theater has, and I think it's because Chicago doesn't have Broadway or the film and TV business to distract it. "

" When I hear young people today complain about being bored - and the things that keep them from being bored are generally exclusively videogames and/or computer pastimes - I just try to encourage them to go outside. "

" Meat is a big deal in my life. I do love breakfast food, but I don't think that's extraordinary. I'm a normal American. We love eggs and meat and potatoes and gravy. "

" And what we've lost sight of is that performing manual labor with your hands is one of the most incredibly satisfying and positive things you can do. "

" I grew up among farmers in Illinois and so you always have to have the tools you might need in the eventuality of a flat tire or a broken window. "

" I would like Americans to make things with their hands. Thomas Jefferson and I feel that makes for a much stronger nation. "

" For years I drove a big Ford F250 pickup. That was my ride because two-thirds of my work was wood work, and I'm always driving up to Northern California, where I harvest salvaged trees. "

" I am always so happy to be at 'SNL.' I still feel like a kid when I'm there, like I can't believe I'm watching them make the show. "

" I've been working steadily as an actor since around 1998. I wasn't well known in the public, but I was a dependable working journeyman. "

" I've learned through experience that to trouble celebrities with my handshake doesn't do anybody any good. "

" I worked a lot in Chicago's theater scene as a fight choreographer. And so I do have a lot of experience in stage combat and also in Kabuki dance and Kabuki theater. "

" You know, it's hard to beat bacon at anytime of day. But I also am a big fan of corned beef hash. "

" If you're an original thinker, you are going get told 'no' a lot, and you have to be able to hear 'no' many times from the bankers and trust that at some point, someone is going to recognize that you are an artist and not a can of soda. "

" I have a wonderfully hedonistic appetite, and if I wasn't really strict with myself, I'd weigh 300 pounds. I'm not good with moderation. "

" My wife happens to be probably the greatest working woman in comedy. I can't think of anyone who even approaches her achievements and her abilities. "

" It's funny, growing up there was never anybody around me with any kind of artistic bent. "

" I spent a lot of my youth working outside in the elements, and I kind of revel in defeating tough weather. "

" I'm enjoying the opportunity that 'Parks And Recreation' affords me to exploit my own soapbox agenda, which is to try to encourage people to make things with their hands. "

" I always had a lot of confidence in my work and the unique flavor I like to bring to my characters, but you know I'm not a huge dreamer. "

" I also grew up building theatrical scenery. I spent many years building scenery as a large part of my income and that allowed me to really develop my shop skills. "

" I have a corn creamer that I love. It extracts pulp and juice from kernels, and I simmer that down into a creamed corn that has an almost mashed potato-like consistency. I add butter and hit it with chopped fresh chives at the end for an accent of color. "

" I think it's fascinating that I receive attention for what people perceive to be a level of manliness or machismo, when amongst my family of farmers and paramedics and regular Americans, I'm kind of the sissy in my family. "

" When I was in high school, I would perform every year in those plays and there was something I really loved about it. But I was completely unaware that you could sort of get into an acting career. "

" My uncles, who are farmers in Minooka, Illinois - I grew up with them and their pickup trucks and mustaches, and to me that was masculinity: big hairy sweaty guys who could pick up a bus. "

" I am a saxophone player. "

" If properly dried and trimmed, New York-style pizza could be used to make a box for Chicago-style pizza. "

" I grew up in a small town in Illinois, and my dad was a basketball coach. Thanks to him, I have excellent fundamentals in both basketball and baseball. "

" We have such an embarrassment of riches when it comes to choice. Do you want to hike in the Alps? There are 300 pairs of shoes you can order within the next 10 minutes. You have your choice of everything. "