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" I'm not a prettier everywoman. I am an everywoman that they clean up awfully well for T.V. "

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" I think children are like pancakes. You sort of ruin the first one, and you get better at it the second time around. "

" I work out with a trainer, Anna Kaiser, three days a week. "

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" I'd rather not have a moment when I'm known for my looks; being funny and interesting lasts longer. "

" When I'm at work, I'm remembering what I forgot to do for the kids, and when I'm with the kids, I'm remembering what I forgot to do at work. "

" If there's cheesecake in the house, I'll have some. "

" If I'm exhausted and I just don't feel like it, then I don't do it. I am a human being, after all. But I also know I'm the kind of person who, if I take one day off, well, it's very easy for me to take the next day off and then quit exercising. "

" I don't have the best family history heart-wise, so I really try to keep my heart strong. "

" I'll quit tanning when the satchel handle grows out of my back. "

" Having been a cheerleader, I know all too well what these girls give up to join forces and compete. "

" If you're a waiter and you're waiting on me, you might get five percent, you might get seventy percent. It depends on how bad my math skills are that day. "

" When you have an entire amphitheatre of people laughing that way, it makes you feel so funny and it frees you to go further than you probably would. "

" I try to make my heart beat out of my chest, hard-core, once a day for at least a half hour. I think that's very important. "

" There's no such thing as an uber-mom. "

" I'm like any working mom. "

" Please get on an airplane or a horse, because it's pretty spectacular. "

" In some ways, her life is so much worse that everybody else's, people feel almost cheered up and inspired. They feel like, 'If Hayley hasn't killed herself, why should I?' "