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" It is not that sport, over-indulged in, coarsens the mind; it is that it dulls it. "
Will Self
Mind
Sport
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" It is fair to say that insofar as sport is taken seriously by those who play it, then to that extent their conduct in play - their ability to deal with loss or victory, their ability to meld strategic thinking and brute force - can be taken as a small-scale model of how they, or others like them, might behave in life. "
Will Self
Loss
Life
Play
" Sometimes the crowd is the madness - at others it's the absence of the crowd that is. "
Will Self
Others
Sometimes
Absence
" Of course, with well-masticated food playing the role of social glue, it's absolutely essential that everyone clear their plate. Sod the starving kiddies in Africa - it's the overfed ones here we need to worry about. "
Will Self
Everyone
Need
Worry
" I prefer to write first drafts as soon as possible after waking, so that the oneiric inscape is still present to me. "
Will Self
Possible
Me
First
" Continuous present is all we have, and stream of consciousness - which in a novel is arguably just as artificial as the stilted dialogue that you get in most conventional novels. They're all stratagems to try to get closer to the texture of lived life. "
Will Self
Stream
Life
Lived
" Without a shadow of doubt, Trafalgar Square has to be one of the most crap urban public spaces in the world. "
Will Self
Doubt
Square
Without
" If the government announced that it was going to allocate a vast tranche of education funding purely to the pupils at the best public schools, there would be a national outcry - and yet this is precisely what the Olympics represents in terms of sports funding. "
Will Self
Education
Best
Sports
" The British and American literary worlds operate in an odd kind of symbiosis: our critics think our contemporary novelists are not the stuff of greatness whereas certain contemporary Americans indubitably are. Their critics often advance the exact opposite: British fiction is cool, American naff. "
Will Self
Greatness
American
Cool
" What more chilling indictment of the modern world is there than this: that the condition of the smartphone user is that of a dumb animal. Moooo! "
Will Self
More
Modern
Animal
" Most of us have had that experience - at around puberty - of realising that, despite whatever efforts we put into our chosen sports, we will become at best competent. "
Will Self
Best
Become
Experience
" There is something mysteriously powerful that can happen when young, inchoate minds come into contact with older and more worldly ones in a spirit of intellectual and creative endeavour - if I believed in progress, I suppose that's what I'd call it. "
Will Self
Progress
Spirit
Powerful
" Modernism has a reputation for being a forbidding phenomenon: its visual arts disconcertingly non-representational, its literary efforts devoid of the consolations of plot and character - even its films, it's argued, fall well short of that true desideratum: entertainment. "
Will Self
Reputation
True
Short
" It would seem that I, who never could make much sense of physics when I was at school, have now gained a strong sense of Einsteinian space-time. I am free of the nimbyism of now, and feel a strong kinship with both the dead and the unborn. "
Will Self
Free
Strong
I Am
" Instead of looking at individual buildings, it makes more metaphorical sense to think of New York as one enormous chunk of masonry that has been cut up and carved away. It says, 'This is the ultimate polis, through which humans move like nematodes.' "
Will Self
New
New York
Think
" For myself, I haven't been content to carry on producing books that merely strain against the conventions - as I've grown older, and realised that there aren't that many books left for me to write, so I've become determined that they should be the fictive equivalent of ripping the damn corset off altogether and chucking it on the fire. "
Will Self
Content
Me
Damn
" Live life and write about life. Of the making of many books there is indeed no end, but there are more than enough books about books. "
Will Self
More
Live Life
End
" I like texting as much as the next kidult - and embrace it as yet more evidence, along with email, that we live now in the post-aural age, when an unsolicited phone call is, thankfully, becoming more and more understood to be an unspeakable social solecism, tantamount to an impertinent invasion of privacy. "
Will Self
Live
Phone
Phone Call
" As a bookish adolescent, I sopped up texts as if I were blotting paper and they were fluid. "
Will Self
Fluid
Paper
Adolescent
" I write because I feel driven to write. I write from a sense of inner necessity. I don't write for anything other than that. "
Will Self
Sense
Write
Feel
" A party full of 'likeable' people doesn't bear contemplating. "
Will Self
Likeable
Full
Bear
" Whatever respect photography may once have deserved is now superfluous in view of its own superfluity. "
Will Self
Own
View
Now
" The future continues to preoccupy me as a reliable source of hopes, fears and anxieties, but increasingly the present seems to have no outstanding qualities of its own, being merely a way-station through which events travel to the vast shadow lands of the past. "
Will Self
Future
Travel
Shadow
" As a writer, I'm not convinced that we are the best equipped to understand how we go about the business of literary production. "
Will Self
Business
Understand
Writer
" Who'd want to be a modernist writer in the English-speaking world? "
Will Self
World
Writer
Want
" It might be an idea for all literary critics to read the books they analyse aloud - it certainly helps to fix them in the mind, while providing a readymade seminar with your audience. "
Will Self
Mind
Idea
Fix
" Life, it is true, can be grasped in all its confused futility merely by opening one's eyes and sitting passively, a spectator on the stands of history - but to understand the social processes and conflicts, the interplay between individual and group, even the physicality of human experience, we have need of small-scale models. "
Will Self
Eyes
Experience
Group
" To attempt to write seriously is always, I feel, to fail - the disjunction between my beautifully sonorous, accurate and painfully affecting mental content, and the leaden, halting sentences on the page always seems a dreadful falling short. "
Will Self
Falling
Feel
Page
" In our benighted age, when films about amusement park rides and electronic fidgets scoop the honours, perhaps Hollywood redux is the best we can hope for. "
Will Self
Park
Best
Our
" This is the paradox for me: in failure alone is there any possibility of success. I don't think I'm alone in this - nor do I think it's an attitude that only prevails among people whose work is obviously 'creative'. "
Will Self
Success
Work
Alone
" A short story is a shard, a sliver, a vignette. It's a biopsy on the human condition but it doesn't have this capacity to think autonomously for itself. "
Will Self
Think
Short
Human