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" Jimmy Fallon is handsome. This is an indisputable fact. "
Andy Kindler
Jimmy
Handsome
Fact
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" I did not sell Amway, but I sold Shaklee, which was an Amway-type product sold through multi-level marketing. "
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" I don't hate Dane Cook, but I am trying to go after people I think are capable of more. "
Andy Kindler
Hate
I Am
More
" I think that most people will spend their whole life not figuring out what they're meant to do, or figuring out what they're meant to do on their way to do something else. So I just feel lucky that I know what I love to do. Everything else figures itself out. "
Andy Kindler
Think
Life
Love
" I'm tired of demographic appeal being more important than talent. I want to fight against that. "
Andy Kindler
Want
Fight
Important
" Very unique: I was a singer-songwriter-guitarist. Very unusual in the late Seventies to find a singer-songwriter, and on top of that, a guitarist. "
Andy Kindler
Top
Find
Late
" I'm not trying to do anything except entertain America. "
Andy Kindler
Anything
Trying
Entertain
" I sold door to door for a couple years. As the years recede from the event, I remember less about it, which is probably good for my mind. It was home improvement in Cerritos California, Buena Park, that area. "
Andy Kindler
Good
Improvement
Home
" I have a true love for the old style of Catskill comic. There's a joy in discovering a bad joke... and then there's the joy of delivering it like, 'Isn't this a hacky joke?' "
Andy Kindler
Style
Love
Joy
" I came out to L.A. in '78 to be a musician. I didn't get into comedy until the mid-Eighties. "
Andy Kindler
Until
Came
Comedy
" My goal is to be exactly how I am offstage - although I realize I'm supposed to punctuate it with jokes. "
Andy Kindler
Jokes
Realize
Exactly
" I will say that I wasn't susceptible to Tony Robbins-like pitches, even as a younger man. "
Andy Kindler
Younger
Say
Pitches
" I've sold a lot of different product. Very briefly, I sold Time Life Books on the phone. "
Andy Kindler
Time
Different
Life
" My goal isn't to wake up in the morning and hurt people's feelings. "
Andy Kindler
Wake Up
Goal
Up
" I do notice a lot of people who want to shock to get laughs. It's such a tricky thing; you don't want to make rules about it. There's nobody more hilarious than Dave Attell, and he'd break every rule you set up. But he's funny. "
Andy Kindler
Rules
People
Nobody
" I wanted to like 'Up in the Air' - I like Jason Reitman - but Vera Farmiga left me cold. "
Andy Kindler
Cold
Air
Up
" My manager came up with the name 'State of the Industry,' and it was just one of those things. It just took off. Well, I don't know about 'took off.' I'm not in the stratosphere. "
Andy Kindler
Off
Things
Well
" The cliche that comics always use is that whatever is happening in the news is 'the gift that keeps on giving.' I always thought that was a bunch of nonsense. "
Andy Kindler
Use
Thought
News
" I'm on a mission. If I can make even one person not enjoy something they're currently enjoying, it's all worth it! "
Andy Kindler
Mission
I Can
Worth
" I have so many strong opinions on the entertainment industry, but if I'm in a deli somewhere, and someone says they love that Adam Sandler movie where he dresses up as his twin sister - well, I don't want to make people feel bad for how they feel about things. I'm always courteous, not mean. "
Andy Kindler
Love
Sister
People
" If I love a comic but they have an off night, who am I to say they should have taken out this or added that? It doesn't work that way... I have no interest in hurting people's feelings. "
Andy Kindler
Say
Work
Feelings
" My favorite comedians are basically themselves onstage. "
Andy Kindler
Themselves
Onstage
Comedians
" I would like Albert Brooks to have received the Oscars for best actor, best director and best screenplay for 'Modern Romance.' I love that movie. "
Andy Kindler
Director
Best
Movie
" You can't go wrong with pizza, unless it's terrible pizza. "
Andy Kindler
Pizza
You
Wrong