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" Remember daydreams? No, of course you don't. How could you? Three new text messages have just arrived, and another three, in a moment, will go out. "
Walter Kirn
New
You
Will
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" I'm a magpie in my fiction, taking whatever looks shiny and curious to line the nest of my story. "
Walter Kirn
Story
Shiny
Nest
" People can be so neglectful of each other and of their own heritage - then death intrudes. Conversations we wish that we'd had earlier are had too late. "
Walter Kirn
Late
Wish
Death
" God is a freaking character, with enough foibles, tantrums, and paradoxical behaviors to supply a thousand screenplays. But who do you cast? "
Walter Kirn
Who
Cast
Character
" If writers, like comedians or singers, could only hear themselves bombing as they worked, it's likely that certain books would be cut short after the first few leaden sentences. "
Walter Kirn
Books
First
Short
" Good short-story collections, like good record albums, are almost always hit-and-miss affairs - successful if they include three or four great tracks, wildly successful if they have five. And that's as it should be. "
Walter Kirn
Successful
Good
Always
" I read somewhere once that in the 1960s, fiction writers were troubled by the notion that life was becoming stranger and more sensational than made-up stories could ever hope to be. Our new problem - more profound, I think - is that life no longer resembles a story. Events intersect but don't progress. People interact but don't make contact. "
Walter Kirn
Hope
Life
New
" My primary ambition is to be a fiction writer... Being a critic wasn't an aspiration of mine. "
Walter Kirn
Ambition
Writer
Mine
" When we have a favorite writer, it's always the places where they grew up, lived, worked, and that they recreated on the page that we most want to visit and commune with. Faulkner's Mississippi, Raymond Chandler's Los Angeles, etc. The mind of the reader longs to be somewhere, not just anywhere, and certainly not nowhere. "
Walter Kirn
Los Angeles
Want
Page
" A president, like a college freshman, can't know in advance which questions he'll have to answer or what topics he'll have to master. He has to be flexible, supple, and responsive. He has to be comfortable with multiple-choice. "
Walter Kirn
Comfortable
Questions
College
" Everyone his own cinematographer. His own stream-of-consciousness e-mail poet. His own nightclub DJ. His own political columnist. His own biographer of his top-10 friends! "
Walter Kirn
DJ
Own
Friends
" E-mails, phone calls, Web sites, videos. They're still all letters, basically, and they've come to outnumber old-fashioned conversations. They are the conversation now. "
Walter Kirn
Phone
Conversation
Now
" The reason con artists get away with what they get away with is, their victims are ashamed of their own blindness and their own gullibility, and they tend to just quietly go away. "
Walter Kirn
Blindness
Go
Reason
" A writer who isn't writing is asking for trouble. "
Walter Kirn
Trouble
Asking
Writing
" To young people born under the weird planet of the SAT, intelligence was equated with agility, with raw acuity. It produced a certain sort of person of which I was a typical specimen: the mental contortionist, able to rise to almost every challenge placed before him, except the challenge of real self-knowledge. "
Walter Kirn
Challenge
Weird
People
" I studied English at Princeton in the early eighties in what I consider a period of high obscurity. Professors and students ran around discussing the work of critics and philosophers that I doubt they'd read or understood. "
Walter Kirn
Doubt
Students
Early
" Writing about the future and the past is less a way of dramatizing change than of showing, by way of contrast, what abides. "
Walter Kirn
Less
Past
Future
" Size has nothing to do with literature. All legs are long enough to touch the ground, and all books are big enough to fill their covers. "
Walter Kirn
Long
Literature
Touch
" In a world that's smarter than it used to be and, in some ways, smarter than it ought to be, stupidity has a way of making us seem all the more human. "
Walter Kirn
Used
Stupidity
World
" Thanks to Twitter, iPads, BlackBerrys, voice-activated in-dash navigation systems, and a hundred other technologies that offer distraction anywhere, anytime, boredom has loosened its grip on us at last - that once-crushing 'weight' has become, for the most part, a memory. "
Walter Kirn
Become
Thanks
Memory
" When I shoot at the range, I don't feel personally powerful but like the custodian of something powerful. I feel like a successful disciplinarian of something radically alien and potent. Analyze this sensation all you want; you still can't make it go away. "
Walter Kirn
Alien
Feel
Powerful
" If the future, as imagined in literature, is really the present taken to extremes, then the past is also the present, but boiled down. "
Walter Kirn
Down
Past
Present
" We're on Twitter with one side of our personality, and Facebook with another, and LinkedIn with another side of our personality, and we're toggling between them. That's just a version of what an impostor does: shifting from one side of their personality to another with lightning speed. "
Walter Kirn
Speed
Facebook
Personality
" I've been around - having gone to Princeton, and I went to Oxford after that - some pretty fancy characters in my life. And they're just as nutty as the rest of us - sometimes worse. "
Walter Kirn
Sometimes
Rest
My Life
" We want to believe that we're invulnerable, and that people who get tricked deserve it. Well, they don't. And someday the arrogant types who mock the gullible are likely to get their turn to wear the dunce cap. "
Walter Kirn
Turn
Believe
Deserve
" When I was writing about the Republican primaries, it was as though the Bible was a black box that people reached into to pull out edicts and prejudices and rules and opinions, and I wish they had fact-checked it! Especially Rick Santorum. "
Walter Kirn
Bible
Black
People
" I review books as a day job, and through the years I've come to view the contemporary memoir as, almost always, a saga of victimization, sometimes by others, sometimes by the self, and sometimes by illness or misfortune, leading, like clockwork, to healing and redemption. "
Walter Kirn
View
Healing
Self
" Once you realize just the sort of glut of books that exists out there, it does become incumbent on you not to add to it unless you have a damn good reason. "
Walter Kirn
Become
Damn
Good
" Uncertainty doesn't make life worth living, quite, but it does make striving and gambling worth attempting. "
Walter Kirn
Life
Uncertainty
Gambling
" The Bible has been through millions of rounds of exegesis and interpretation, but it hasn't been until quite recently that it's been taken as the absolute truth, to the point where people expect it to inform ideas about biology and life on this planet. "
Walter Kirn
Life
People
Ideas
" Since the founding of Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and other mainstays of what technology writers have come to call 'the social Web' or 'Web 2.0,' a sizable portion of humanity has learned to be together while apart, sacrificing intimacy for control and spontaneity for predictability. "
Walter Kirn
Technology
Control
Together