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" Someday I'm going to go onstage in a dress if I want to. "

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" My dad was a ham, too. He could sell those women anything. Of all his sons, I was the only one he could trust to sell as well as he could. I was proud of that. "

" I don't always prepare such rich meals. Sometimes I'll just serve a simple quiche, salad and dessert for dinner. During the week I try to eat lightly. "

" The dining room in my old house was truly magnificent, but by far the worst room for conversation. I'd get up from the table, a very long table, and somebody would always say, Paul, I never got to talk to you. "

" An actor shouldn't undergo psychoanalysis, because there are a lot of things you're better off not knowing. "

" I laughed all the way through Love Story. "

" Learning lines is on my mind until I do know them. I'll read the paper or paint the house to keep from starting to memorize. I've never found an easy way. "

" I was obsessed with being rich and famous. "

" I don't know who the hell Paul Lynde is, or why he's funny, and I prefer it to be a mystery to me. "

" I have this beautiful antique silver wine decanter that I bought at an auction. I always pour wine from that. "

" A room is like a stage. If you see it without lighting, it can be the coldest place in the world. "

" I can't even get three weeks off to have cosmetic surgery. "

" My kitchen is not a place to live in. I made it white so I can tell instantly if it's not clean-and I like it clean enough to be able to eat off the floors-or the tables, for that matter. "

" I sang in the choir for years, even though my family belonged to another church. "

" The whole romantic part of my life was a wipeout. I didn't even own a belt. "

" Sandwiches are wonderful. You don't need a spoon or a plate! "

" When I said I didn't have a cent, I didn't. I used to get annoyed with people who said they were broke when they had five dollars. "

" If I hadn't become a celebrity, I'd probably be an alcoholic. "

" Food was a constant topic of conversation in our household. "

" A closet full of wire hangers can be the most dangerous place in the world. "

" If I'm not working, I don't know what to do. "

" I feel now it's useless to keep hoping. The way things are today, we live in a world that needs laughter, and I've decided if I can make people laugh, I'm making a more important contribution. "

" The doctor's name was Sylvia. I told her she'd have a problem with me because Sylvia was my mother's name. "

" I think basically an actor is a salesman. "

" My table seats eight, so that's my maximum. Having a small number of guests is the only way to generate good conversation. Besides, your whole house doesn't get wrecked that way. "