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" What other culture could have produced someone like Hemingway and not seen the joke? "

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" What the police in their ignorance have not figured out is that they have lost all credibility since World War II. They are sort of parasites on the fringe of society and do no particular good for anyone except possibly themselves. "

" Primarily, I am a prose writer with axes to grind, and the theatre is a good place to do the grinding in. I prefer comedy to 'serious' drama because I believe one can get the ax sharper on the comedic stone. "

" Remember, I'm West Point, where I was born. My father went there. "

" I hate nobody. "

" You cannot deprive somebody of life, liberty, pursuit of happiness, because that is a right - constitutional right. "

" A racial or religious or tribal identity is a kind of fact. "

" We're not a democracy. "

" I am only at home in the present. "

" I didn't mean to spend my life writing American history, which should have been taught in the schools, but I saw no alternative but to taking it on myself. I could think of a lot of cheerier things I'd rather be doing than analyzing George Washington and Aaron Burr. But it came to pass, that was my job, so I did it. "

" The media can't get anything straight. "

" I'm a fervent foe of water pollution, whether it is our own Hudson River or Philadelphia's tap water. "

" Most children tell themselves stories in which they figure as powerful figures, enjoying the pleasures not only of the adult world as they conceive it but of a world of wonders unlike dull reality. "

" Europe began as the relatively empty, uncivilized Wild West of Asia; then the Western Hemisphere became the Wild West of Europe. Now the sun has set in our West and risen once more in the East. "

" Until the rise of American advertising, it never occurred to anyone anywhere in the world that the teenager was a captive in a hostile world of adults. "

" Of all recent presidents, Clinton was expected to behave the most sensibly in economic matters. He understood how the economy works. But because he had used various dodges to stay out of the Vietnam War, he came to office ill at ease with the military. "

" By 1939, the Depression was back. Unemployment was huge. Roosevelt didn't have any quick fix. Remember, the New Deal, Works Progress Administration, and Civilian Conservation Corps - all that happened years before. Roosevelt was riding a storm. "

" What I like least about myself is my belligerence. "

" There is something about a bureaucrat that does not like a poem. "

" Corporations must pay tax. "

" Every country should have at least one King Farouk. "

" Never have children, only grandchildren. "

" It is the spirit of the age to believe that any fact, no matter how suspect, is superior to any imaginative exercise, no matter how true. "

" All children alarm their parents, if only because you are forever expecting to encounter yourself. "

" Like most readers, I tend to skip the acknowledgements at the beginnings of books: the 'To-My-Wife-Without-Whose-Invaluable-Assistance' kind of thing. "

" Jews, blacks and homosexuals are despised by the Christian and Communist majorities of East and West. Also, as a result of the invention of Israel, Jews can now count on the hatred of the Islamic world. "

" My father had lifelong contempt for politicians. "

" I never miss a chance to have sex or appear on television. "

" Does one ever read a politician's books? "

" The four most beautiful words in our common language: I told you so. "

" I was like everyone else when Obama was elected - optimistic. "