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" You can almost judge how screwed up somebody is by the kind of toilet paper they use. Go in any rich house and it's some weird coloured embossed stuff. "

Captain Beefheart

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" We see the moon, don't we? So it's our eye. Animals see us, don't they? So we're their animals. "

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" I'd rather play a tune on a horn, but I've always felt that I didn't want to train myself. Because when you get a train, you've got to have an engine and a caboose. I think it's better to train the caboose. You train yourself, you strain yourself. "

Captain Beefheart

" Johnny Rotten. He's a big fan of mine. I used to see him out in the audience in England and he'd stand up and holler. He's funny. Smart too, and a nice guy. Don't think he's a jerk because he isn't. "

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" Most of modern rock and roll is a product of guilt. "

Captain Beefheart

" I would never kill a living thing, although I probably have inadvertently while driving automobiles. "

Captain Beefheart

" With my voice and my band, I can do anything. "

Captain Beefheart

" We're all colored, or you wouldn't be able to see anyone. "

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" The stars are matter, we're matter, but it doesn't matter. "

Captain Beefheart

" I'm interested in playing, not working. "

Captain Beefheart

" Man has done a lot to make himself dangerous and animals get the worst of all of it. But then, man too is an animal. "

Captain Beefheart

" I needed to purge myself of all the attention my parents had given me - I wasn't neglected enough as a child. "

Captain Beefheart

" When I see a dolphin, I know it's just as smart as I am. "

Captain Beefheart

" You can tell by the kindness of a dog how a human should be. "

Captain Beefheart

" I live in a Mobile Home - I've never had a house, except once; I rented a log cabin. "

Captain Beefheart

" That Sid Vicious was obviously a schizophrenic, kind of a mean one too. "

Captain Beefheart

" If you want to be a different fish, jump out of school. "

Captain Beefheart

" James Brown is important because he decorates the clock correctly and he's good with lower mathematics. Don't get me wrong - he's good. "

Captain Beefheart

" The wind is a very difficult sound to get. It's always changing. "

Captain Beefheart

" I think Shakespeare is really the one. Words as music and music as words. Everything he wrote was good, which is really frightening. "

Captain Beefheart

" I don't look like a desert person because I stay indoors most of the day and fool around at night. That's what the desert animals do - they don't have a tan either. "

Captain Beefheart

" I don't think artists are made, I think they're born. "

Captain Beefheart

" I think most people try to get others to see through their eyes. "

Captain Beefheart

" I have no neighbours other than animals and Joshua Trees. "

Captain Beefheart

" I'd never just want to do what everybody else did. I'd be contributing to the sameness of everything. "

Captain Beefheart