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All Quotes by author - Ellie Kemper

" A lot of people ask, 'What's the best advice Tina Fey's given you?' But she doesn't, like, go about doling out advice - like, 'I've got another tip for you!' "

" A man's face is not a rich person's lawn; you are wasting resources if you devote that much energy to trimming your beard, sideburns, or mustache just so. Nor is a man's face the woods; there need not be the tangled weeds, shrubbery, and wildlife/eggs benedict that get ensnared in them. "

" For a few months, I'd have a green juice every day, but one day, I realized I'd rather eat those ingredients than drink them. "

" Growing up, I had one very specific idea of what a wedding should be, and that was the wedding of Fraulein Maria and Captain von Trapp in 'The Sound of Music.' "

" I always have ice cream in the house. I have a bowl of it, and then a bit more. One of the greatest pleasures in my life is going back and getting a second half-bowl. The first bowl is just the prelude. "

" I am fully anticipating that something - perhaps many things - will not go according to plan on our actual wedding day. If some of the flowers are wilted, or there aren't enough vegetarian meals, or the priest calls me the wrong name, I will embrace these errors. "

" I can't do impressions. "

" If I don't do some sort of exercise in a day, I do get in a terrible mood. That's always been true. "

" If I'm alone, I tend to cook for myself. I do a pretty good job of preparing healthful foods. My go-to is everything in a bowl like quinoa, avocado. Later in the day, scrambled eggs. I'm not a gourmet chef. I cook in bulk very well. "

" If you're going to plan a wedding, then a certain amount of suffering is not a choice. "

" If you're tired, you shouldn't make yourself exercise. Take a nap instead. It's about getting an appropriate amount of work and rest. I get very crabby if I'm not well-rested. "

" I guess it's easier to think badly and then be pleasantly surprised. "

" I have found I'm leaning toward more vibrant colors because I'm so happy in them. "

" I have given myself dork shivers so many times that I would be an outright liar if I characterized myself as anything other than a pure, utter, and unadulterated dork. "

" I have very sensitive skin, and so, whenever I can, I want to give it a rest. I'm, like, the moisturizing queen. "

" I joined an improv comedy group. Ours was named 'Quick Fire!' with an exclamation point. It was when I auditioned for that team and got on it and felt like... I'll just say I felt like I was good at it. "

" I like healthful foods, but I'm from the Midwest, so I like food that's been around longer. "

" I look forward to physical activity; it's a release from stress and a nice distraction. It puts me in a better mood. I never used to take classes before, but then I tore my plantar fascia so I couldn't run. I started taking SoulCycle classes, which I know are polarizing. People have strong opinions. Even though I can run again, I still go. "

" I love coffee, but I have to make sure I don't have more than one cup a day because I'm already a little hyper. "

" I loved 'Freaks and Geeks.' I don't know a better show. "

" I love, love, love, love, love, love Naeem Khan. Every dress he makes looks like it belongs in a museum. You put it on, and you feel like royalty. "

" I love running. I've been running ever since middle school. In terms of clearing your head and restarting everything, I love running. "

" I'm a little disappointed in myself because before getting pregnant, I resolved to do all these things during my pregnancy to nurse a healthy pregnancy. And so I'm finding in these final weeks that I didn't do any of them. "

" I'm a morning bird. I love getting up before it's light out if it's possible. I wake up, I have a black coffee. I'm an 86-year-old man. I try to work out first thing to get it over with. When I do it, I feel good because I have the endorphins all day. "

" I'm not on social media because I feel like that would be just such another level of responsibility that I don't feel up to. It's not uncommon now to have personal and public intertwined, and I don't know how people are able to manage that. I don't know where you go when you want to be alone if everything is out there. "

" Improv is mostly what I've studied. "

" I need to make sure that when I'm running out to the drugstore I'm not wearing a Biore strip or something. Not that I expect anyone to recognize me, but on the off chance they do, I just don't want to embarrass myself. "

" In Los Angeles, people dress with the deep and earnest hope that people will do nothing but stare at them. "

" In the back of my head, I always thought it would be great to become an actress on a sitcom. "

" I think I get certain pleasure from writing what I'm performing. "

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