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All Quotes by author - Maya Rudolph
" Before I had children, everything about my life was devoted to Saturday Night Live. "
Life
Live
My Life
" I don't know if comedy is a male sport. I always wondered that. "
Comedy
Always
Know
" I feel like I come from a smaller off shoot of black people because I am mixed. People say I'm African American but that doesn't include the other half of me. "
Feel
Black
Me
" I feel like I'm a drag queen. "
Feel
Queen
Like
" If my time with my kids is shorter than it was yesterday, it's better than nothing. "
Yesterday
Nothing
Time
" I get anxious. That lovely Jewish guilt that comes with ancestry. "
Jewish
Guilt
Lovely
" I have an equal opportunity womb! "
Equal Opportunity
Equal
Opportunity
" I learned the enormous power of writing for yourself, especially now that people seem to be receptive to the fact that women can write. "
Women
Power
Writing
" I like comedy as a group sport. "
Like
Sport
Group
" I never thought I'd get a chance to do what I'm doing. It's such a dream. "
Doing
Chance
Thought
" I really love laughing. "
Love
Laughing
Really
" I still have a fantasy of being a musician when I grow up. "
Being
Fantasy
Grow
" I think that people who don't like kids are awful people. "
I Think
People
Think
" I've been writing joke songs since I was a kid and it served me well at S.N.L. I can write those in my sleep. In fact, I have. "
Me
I Can
Joke
" I've met people who are baffled by children, as though they were never children themselves. "
Though
Never
Children
" I've never set out to write a funny movie or be a funny comedian as a woman. I am a woman. I don't really have a choice in the matter. My goal is just to be funny. "
Funny
Woman
Matter
" I was a loud child, and if my mother sang to me, I would be quiet. "
Loud
Me
Quiet
" I would love it if you would come in and teach me how to really do you. "
You
Me
Teach
" Lord knows I had what you could call many fashion Don'ts in my day. "
Day
Call
Lord
" Most of my life I didn't feel very normal. There's definitely been some moments where I feel like, all right, I've finally graduated and I'm a normal lady. "
Moments
Feel
Lady
" No, no, no. Your accent is so beautiful. "
Accent
Your
Beautiful
" There are days when I wonder why my mom couldn't be here to see this. "
Days
Here
Mom
" To grow up with the loss of your mother is a scar that never goes away. "
Loss
Grow
Away
" To have your childhood dream realized is a really big deal. "
Childhood
Big
Your
" Without a doubt in sketch comedy there are fewer women than men. "
Doubt
Comedy
Than
" You don't want to be the first person to tell your 5-year-old, like, 'You're going to have a life filled with disappointments and letdowns - enjoy!' "
Tell
Life
Want
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