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" Americans are a quarter of a billion people who have almost nothing in common except for the fact they've been told they have lots in common. "

Douglas Coupland

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" If I don't learn something new every year, I go crazy. "

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" I want pills called September 10. You take one and your mind feels like the 11th never happened. "

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" You can get a subjective and highly factual dossier on most anyone in the public realm almost instantly. It's why publishers don't worry about author photos any more; people just Google a person and get on with things. "

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" I was so beautiful when I was young. And I took so few photos because I felt so skinny and ugly. I wish I'd just taken a few more shots. "

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" In 2008 we came perilously close to killing money, exposing in the process how out of date money's infrastructure has become. "

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" There's much to be said for feeling numb. Time passes more quickly. You eat less, and because numbness encourages laziness, you do fewer things, good or bad, and the world's probably a better place for it. "

Douglas Coupland

" When Donald Duck traded his wings for arms, was he trading up or trading down? "

Douglas Coupland

" Once you see someone lose it, you can never look at them the same way again. "

Douglas Coupland

" People are pretty forgiving when it comes to other people's families. The only family that ever horrifies you is your own. "

Douglas Coupland

" If I think too much about all of those Chinese factories where all the stuff in a Wal-Mart is made, I get that woozy feeling you get when you see ducks covered in crude oil. "

Douglas Coupland

" Brain research tells us that only twenty percent of human beings have a sense of irony, which means that eighty percent of the world takes everything at face value. "

Douglas Coupland

" You can't get mad at weather because weather's not about you. Apply that lesson to most other aspects of life. "

Douglas Coupland

" I'm always looking for things that are so incredibly present that they become invisible. "

Douglas Coupland

" In Canada, we're happy to provide a safe haven for next-door neighbors in the middle of a marital dispute. And if anyone trips while crossing the border, we're happy to set their broken bones for free. "

Douglas Coupland

" I've never really seen too much difference between writing or making visual art or designing furniture or clothing. It's still my brain - I'm just using different parts of it for different things. "

Douglas Coupland

" It feels wistful to imagine a time when people didn't go about their daily routine with the assumption that at any moment another massive media technology will be dumped on us by some geek in California. "

Douglas Coupland

" The whole point of Gen X was, and continues to be, a negation of being forced into Baby Boomerdom against one's will. "

Douglas Coupland

" It's very strange that most people don't care if their knowledge of their family history only goes back three generations. "

Douglas Coupland

" Nature is one great big wood-chipper. Sooner or later, everything shoots out the other end in a spray of blood, bones and hair. "

Douglas Coupland

" Adventure without risk is Disneyland. "

Douglas Coupland

" Make your goals big and broad enough so that they never become answered prayers and boomerang to curse you. "

Douglas Coupland

" Telling people they look relaxed makes them look relaxed. "

Douglas Coupland

" I grew up with three brothers, so nearly everything I had was destroyed or made fun of. "

Douglas Coupland

" A vast percentage of the human race is literally not wired neurologically to get irony. Well more than half of humanity takes life at face value, which is to me terrifying. "

Douglas Coupland

" Human beings are the only animal that thinks they change who they are simply by moving to a different place. Birds migrate, but it's not quite the same thing. "

Douglas Coupland

" A bland smile is like a green light at an intersection, it feels good when you get one, but you forget it the moment you're past it. "

Douglas Coupland

" It's fun to sentimentalize the 20th-century lifestyle and the 20th-century brain, but it helps nobody, it makes you look ancient, there's no going back, and you'd be miserable if you did. "

Douglas Coupland

" When future archaeologists dig up the remains of California, they're going to find all of those gyms their scary-looking gym equipment, and they're going to assume that we were a culture obsessed with torture. "

Douglas Coupland

" Vancouver is the square root of negative one. Technically it shouldn't exist, but it does. I can't imagine living anywhere else. "

Douglas Coupland

" I've got 911 on speed dial. "

Douglas Coupland