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" Bath twice a day to be really clean, once a day to be passably clean, once a week to avoid being a public menace. "

Anthony Burgess

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" The downtrodden are the great creators of slang. "

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" One of the delights known to age, and beyond the grasp of youth, is that of Not Going. "

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" Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone. "

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" Violence among young people is an aspect of their desire to create. They don't know how to use their energy creatively so they do the opposite and destroy. "

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" Americans will listen, but they do not care to read. War and Peace must wait for the leisure of retirement, which never really comes: meanwhile it helps to furnish the living room. "

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" If you believe in an unseen Christ, you will believe in the unseen Christlike potential of others. "

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" He said it was artificial respiration, but now I find I am to have his child. "

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" Books in a large university library system: 2,000,000. Books in an average large city library: 10,000. Average number of books in a chain bookstore: 30,000. Books in an average neighborhood branch library: 20,000. "

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" Women thrive on novelty and are easy meat for the commerce of fashion. Men prefer old pipes and torn jackets. "

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" Life is a wretched gray Saturday, but it has to be lived through. "

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" Every dogma has its day. "

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" It's always good to remember where you come from and celebrate it. To remember where you come from is part of where you're going. "

Anthony Burgess

" I went abroad to Malaya and came back and tended naturally to gravitate towards the south, I suppose, near London where things seemed to be going on; but I'm still a Lancashire man, and what I want to write someday is a novel about Manchester. Very much a regional novel. "

Anthony Burgess

" I enjoy journalism; anybody does. You see the results immediately; you've got an immediate audience instead of having to wait for your audience as you do if you're writing a book, and you get a bit of money coming in, and you can see more clearly how you're paying the bills. But it's not a good position for the serious novelist to be in. "

Anthony Burgess

" The possession of a book becomes a substitute for reading it. "

Anthony Burgess

" When I first began to write fiction, I didn't think I was a comic writer; I thought I was a serious writer. I was surprised when the first novel I wrote was regarded as a funny novel. "

Anthony Burgess

" The unconscious mind has a habit of asserting itself in the afternoon. "

Anthony Burgess

" The country needs and, unless I mistake its temper, the country demands bold, persistent, experimentation. It is common sense to take a method and try it, if it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something. "

Anthony Burgess

" I'm a natural clown, I suppose, in writing, and one has to accept that; I can't do anything about it. I have written one or two novels which are not specifically funny. I wrote a study of Shakespeare which was not intended to be funny, but some people regard it as such. "

Anthony Burgess

" A novelist should not be too intelligent either, although... he may be permitted to be an intellectual. "

Anthony Burgess

" To write is to become disinterested. There is a certain renunciation in art. "

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" We all need money, but there are degrees of desperation. "

Anthony Burgess

" I didn't think; I experimented. "

Anthony Burgess