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" Comedy chose me. "

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" I'm a performer. "

" Banging on the piano while my grandmother was watching me. I'd run up to her and ask: 'How was that, Grandma?' And she'd say, 'That was beautiful, baby!' And I'd run back to the piano and play some more. I'm sure that's why I still play today, because I was encouraged from such a young age, 2 or 3. "

" I'm a band leader and substitute teacher, and then one day they bring me into a music class, and I'm like, 'Wait a minute, I know this stuff.' And the principal is like, 'Just throw the video in and call it a day,' and I'm like, 'That's not good enough. I want these kids to know what it's like to have a gig and all that kind of stuff.' "

" I think fans are going to get everything you'd expect from 'The Office', from awkwardness, to a lot of humor and heart. "

" If you're going to be the lead, you better be ready to always be working. "

" People do ask me for advice for some reason. And I'll just kind of pose it back to them and let them answer on their own. I never like to give my advice 'cause I don't want them to come back and 'You were wrong! You ruined my life!' so it's more about 'Hey, this is what you just told me. What does that sound like to you?' "

" I probably have more words to say in 'Mr. Robot' than I've had in my entire career put together. "

" I got a call from my manager saying, 'Howie Mandel wants to talk to you.' And I'm a comic - big fan of all he's done. He was pitching me 'Caraoke Showdown', and I was just excited about it. "

" I think I said something mean when I was little, and my mother snapped on me. I was just like, 'I'm sorry!' I could relate. If I had cursed out my dad, I probably would be just waking up. "

" My parents did the whole good-cop/bad-cop thing - Dad was the bad cop, and Mom was the good cop. I remember my father saying, 'I'm his father, not his friend.' That kind of stuck with me. "

" That's the most gratifying thing in the world, helping each other. "

" I so respect Sundance. I'd been hearing about it for years. "

" I have done my share of karaoke. There is a karaoke place right around the corner from me, and I have been there maybe 800 of 1,000 days I've been in L.A. A lot of songs I know now because of that place. I dig karaoke and have fun with it. "

" I'm Mr. Grits. One of the non-perishables. "

" I've seen some beyond-amazing performers do karaoke who should be on stage somewhere, and I've seen people who you rather didn't enter the bar. That's the beautiful thing about it; it's for everybody. "

" I was in a TV show called 'Lucky' on FX. The casting director from 'Lucky' was casting 'Dragon Wars'. She called me in to meet with the producer and audition, and I got it from there. "

" The end of 2016, Mariah Carey got on stage, and it was mean. The technical difficulties that she came across, now everybody think that she was lost. "

" It's funny to see how people react to the project, to read their thoughts, and I wonder aloud, 'Did they even watch the movie? Did they even get it?' I know we, myself and the entire cast, put a lot of heart, love and humor into 'Meet the Peeples'. I'm very proud of that film and what we were able to accomplish. "

" I got mad love for hot tubs. "

" There's something about seeing somebody who thinks they're great and is so wrapped up in their moves, voice, and performance that makes it so wonderfully charming that you can't take your eyes off. That's why we all remember William Hung from those first years of 'American Idol. It's the William Hung effect. "

" It's always nice to do a family movie, because I do a lot of R-rated stuff. "

" A music teacher. It was in the inner city at a school called Horace Mann. I think I was most effective when the kids pissed me off. "

" I can bring a crowd down. There should be a contest for that. "

" Nothing is guaranteed. "

" Nick Swardson used to have birthday paint parties. They were phenomenal. "

" I'm starring in the 'New Adventures of Voltron'. I play Voltron. "

" I was in my early twenties. I was 22-ish. I graduated from college and went right into teaching. The first year, I taught in Indiana at a couple schools, and then I moved over to Chicago. "

" Doing voiceover is so much fun because you can play with the lines as much as you want. You can put a whole bunch of energy into it, jump up and down, whatever you got to do. "

" Ever since I can remember, I've always been silly. "

" I never wanted to do just one thing. There's even other things in comedy that I want to do. For me, it's always been that I have to have the vision first. "