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" Every dog must have his day. "

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" I wonder what fool it was that first invented kissing. "

" Promises and pie-crust are made to be broken. "

" There were many times my pants were so thin I could sit on a dime and tell if it was heads or tails. "

" Where I am not understood, it shall be concluded that something very useful and profound is couched underneath. "

" One enemy can do more hurt than ten friends can do good. "

" It is a maxim among these lawyers, that whatever hath been done before, may legally be done again: and therefore they take special care to record all the decisions formerly made against common justice and the general reason of mankind. "

" Men are happy to be laughed at for their humor, but not for their folly. "

" Principally I hate and detest that animal called man; although I heartily love John, Peter, Thomas, and so forth. "

" The power of fortune is confessed only by the miserable, for the happy impute all their success to prudence or merit. "

" A lie does not consist in the indirect position of words, but in the desire and intention, by false speaking, to deceive and injure your neighbour. "

" There are few, very few, that will own themselves in a mistake. "

" There is nothing constant in this world but inconsistency. "

" A wise person should have money in their head, but not in their heart. "

" He was a bold man that first ate an oyster. "

" Every man desires to live long, but no man wishes to be old. "

" Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed. "

" A tavern is a place where madness is sold by the bottle. "

" Human brutes, like other beasts, find snares and poison in the provision of life, and are allured by their appetites to their destruction. "

" A wise man should have money in his head, but not in his heart. "

" Censure is the tax a man pays to the public for being eminent. "

" Vanity is a mark of humility rather than of pride. "

" Invention is the talent of youth, as judgment is of age. "

" No wise man ever wished to be younger. "

" The stoical scheme of supplying our wants by lopping off our desires, is like cutting off our feet when we want shoes. "

" When a true genius appears, you can know him by this sign: that all the dunces are in a confederacy against him. "

" Don't set your wit against a child. "

" Laws are like cobwebs, which may catch small flies, but let wasps and hornets break through. "

" Words are but wind; and learning is nothing but words; ergo, learning is nothing but wind. "

" Satire is a sort of glass, wherein beholders do generally discover everybody's face but their own. "

" As love without esteem is capricious and volatile; esteem without love is languid and cold. "