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" Every morning I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work. "

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" Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work. "

" Never raise your hand to your children - it leaves your midsection unprotected. "

" President Ford used humor a great deal. "

" Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that's not true. Some of the smaller countries are neutral. "

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" To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so. "

" More than ever before, Americans are suffering from back problems: back taxes, back rent, back auto payments. "

" There are days when it takes all you've got just to keep up with the losers. "

" Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch. "

" Inflation is bringing us true democracy. For the first time in history, luxuries and necessities are selling at the same price. "

" I got a Valentine's Day card from my girl. It said, 'Take my heart! Take my arms! Take my lips!' Which is just like her. Keeping the best part for herself. "

" Humor starts like a wildfire, but then continues on, smoldering, smoldering for years. "

" There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all. "

" Spring is God's way of saying, 'One more time!' "

" What bothers me about TV is that it tends to take our minds off our minds. "

" Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get. "

" Time flies. It's up to you to be the navigator. "

" Don't think of it as failure. Think of it as time-released success. "

" Happiness is a very small desk and a very big wastebasket. "

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" Planned obsolescence is not really a new concept. God used it with people. "

" Love is so confusing - you tell a girl she looks great and what's the first thing you do? Turn out the lights! "

" If you can laugh together, you can work together. "

" Inflation is the crabgrass in your savings. "