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" French children seem to be able to play by themselves in a way. "
Pamela Druckerman
Seem
Able
Children
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" I think, in writing a memoir, you kind of give order to your life. "
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" I think kids in France, and certainly in my household, don't necessarily stop interrupting when you tell them, but they gradually become more aware of other people, and that means that you can have the expectation of finishing a conversation. "
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" Even for natives, French satire is rarely laugh-out-loud funny. Its unspoken punch line is typically that things have gone irrevocably wrong, and the government is to blame. "
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" Optimism - even, and perhaps especially in the face of difficulty - has long been an American hallmark. "
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" Babies aren't savages. Toddlers understand language long before they can talk. "
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" You know you're in your 40s when you've spent 48 hours trying to think of a word, and that word was 'hemorrhoids.' "
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" I gradually understood why European mothers aren't in perpetual panic about their work-life balance and don't write books about how executive moms should just try harder: Their governments are helping them - and doing it competently. "
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" Every time I pass a cafe, I imagine it being stormed by men with Kalashnikovs. "
Pamela Druckerman
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Being
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" Get rid of the idea of kids' food. Kids can eat whatever adults can eat. You know, there is one dinner, and everyone has the same thing. "
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" Teach your kids emotional intelligence. Help them become more evolved than you are. Explain that, for instance, not everyone will like them. "
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" In your 40s, you kind of know how things are likely to go, and you're better at saying, 'You know what? That just doesn't suit me...' I remember thinking in my 30s, 'I should go to Burning Man. I could be a Burning Man person.' And in my 40s, I'm like, 'You know what? I'm never going to go to Burning Man.' "
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Remember
Saying
You
" I'm a third-generation Miamian. I'm fond of it. I'm an expatriate, so it's the only American city I can still legitimately claim. "
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Only
Claim
I Can
" When you're the foreigner and your kids are the natives, they realize you're clueless much sooner than they ordinarily would. I'm pretty sure mine skipped the Mommy-is-infallible stage entirely. "
Pamela Druckerman
Pretty
You
Your
" One of the many problems with parenting is that kids keep changing. Just when you're used to one stage, they zoom into another. "
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Problems
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" Early childhood offerings vary, but everywhere in Europe and in Canada, they're far more generous than in the United States. Ukrainian dads may not change enough diapers, but their government offers paid maternity leave; practically free preschool; and per-baby payments equivalent to eight months of an average salary. "
Pamela Druckerman
Government
Change
Childhood
" My husband is so upset by President Trump's scapegoating of immigrants and Muslims, he refuses to even visit the United States. "
Pamela Druckerman
President
Upset
Husband
" I hear people in their 20s describe the 40s as a far-off decade of too-late, when they'll regret things that they haven't done. But for older people I meet, the 40s are the decade that they would most like to travel back to. "
Pamela Druckerman
Done
Back
Regret
" Where Americans might coo over a child's most inane remark to boost his confidence, middle-class French parents teach their kids to be concise and amusing, to keep everyone listening. "
Pamela Druckerman
Confidence
Parents
Listening
" While I love walking past those beautifully lit bookstores in my neighborhood, what I mostly buy there are blank notebooks and last-minute presents for children's birthdays. "
Pamela Druckerman
Walking
Past
Birthdays
" America's parenting customs can shock foreigners. "
Pamela Druckerman
Parenting
America
Foreigners
" My family was once invited to lunch at a chateau owned by a friend of a friend. As we drove our rental car up to the giant castle, my kids gasped and said, 'They must be rich!' "
Pamela Druckerman
Rich
Car
Said
" I'm always hoping no one is following me around with a camera. "
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Always
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Me
" This idea - that the only way to mend the relationship post-affair is through therapy - is unique to the American script. "
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" Parisians won't admit that they go to the gym, let alone that they're scared of terrorists. "
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Admit
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" The French view is really one of balance, I think... What French women would tell me over and over is, it's very important that no part of your life - not being a mom, not being a worker, not being a wife - overwhelms the other part. "
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Balance
" I've got letters from all over the world saying what you're describing as American parenting is Chilean middle-class parenting, or it is Finnish middle-class parenting, or it is Slovak middle-class parenting. "
Pamela Druckerman
World
American
Parenting
" Soon after Donald Trump was inaugurated, I got a letter from France's interior ministry informing me that I was now French. By the time it arrived, I'd been French for nearly two weeks without even knowing it. "
Pamela Druckerman
Two
Time
Me
" I've gotten used to being a foreigner. "
Pamela Druckerman
Gotten
Being
Used
" When I moved to Europe 12 years ago, my biggest concern was whether I'd ever speak decent French. Practically every American I knew came to visit, many saying they dreamed of living here, too. "
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Here
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Saying
" The main thing my bookcase says about me is that I'm not French. "
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Main
Says