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" I don't think there's anybody better than Leonardo DiCaprio, and I've been saying that since before anyone knew who he was. "

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" Unless you're flat out dead, you have to think of some other questions like: what's on the other side? It brings up issues of God, or no God. How does he play into this? Or he, or she, or it? How does it all play into this? "

" Technology, you know. I'm pretty horrible. I use it, but mostly I like to view it from afar. But I'm still fascinated by it. "

" I used to work on a survey crew, because my dad was an engineer, but he was also a surveyor. "

" I still really like newspapers. I'm gonna feel really sad when they go. Or not - maybe I'll be dead. "

" Weirdly, for someone who wanted to be funny, I didn't like a lot of attention. "

" There're only a few photographers I've ever felt really comfortable with. "

" Leaving a lot of movie sets, I've gone home and said, 'How come my hands are clean?' I should finish something and go home with dirt in my fingernails, because then you really feel that you've done something. "

" I had a real strong fantasy life as a kid. But then you grow up and think about real jobs. "

" Colbert makes me crazy: he's so funny. Plus, he seems like an extraordinarily decent dude. "

" Chris Nolan is great, but I've never seen any of the 'Batman' movies all the way through. I know they're good. I just have zero interest in those kinds of movies. "

" I'm in a business that invites narcissism, self-involvement, and egos being blown out of proportion. "

" I went through a lazy period. "

" To say directing was a long-stewing ambition doesn't cover it. If you cut me open, you'd see it. "

" I watch 'Morning Joe' occasionally. I used to watch a lot more than I do now, but I watched it, and all of a sudden, there was this love fest, for crying out loud - this inexplicable love fest one morning - for The Donald. "

" Actors don't get to be well-known if they're horrible. "

" If you get a good comedy once a year, man, that's pretty good. I may be pickier than some, but still, there aren't that many movies that are really, truly, honestly that funny. "

" Guys who go on and on about loving women usually don't. "

" People always make these generalized statements about Hollywood, and there's all kinds of people in Hollywood. "

" I've got a statue of St. Francis in my front yard, and I'm not even a practicing Catholic. "

" I have some tremendous, tremendously loving, generous friends all over the world. "

" Anyone can be a celebrity now; this is not a big deal anymore. "

" David Letterman used to say, 'I wasn't the class clown, but I wrote for him,' and that's exactly it. You want to be known to be funny without having it pointed out. "

" I guess I'm probably a Method actor; I don't know... I just think of it as staying in the zone. "

" Filmmaking is the ultimate team sport. "

" I'm the seventh child of George and Leona Douglas, and I don't ever remember a time when my father didn't work two jobs. When my mother was going to the grocery, or going to Mass, or trying to take care of seven kids in a run-down farmhouse. "

" I was an altar boy, which I loved and am very proud of. It was strict, but also really nice. "

" My first day in grade school, I was plain scared. I left the comfort of my run-down house, which I loved, and went to school where it was cold, it smelled, the lighting was bad. "

" I have a lot of energy, and I move around a lot in my club act. "

" Sometimes I do movies that aren't any good, or sometimes I might not be any good in them, or sometimes they don't do very well. "

" I saw 'Wild,' and I thought, 'Wow, this is a lot of things, but one of the things is it's a therapist's dream and a climate-change denier's nightmare.' "