Get QuoteDark Inspirational Quotes App

" I read every book about Buster Keaton and Chaplin to see how they worked - it's all about dedication, tunnel vision, pursuit of perfection, getting the gag right. "

Related Quotes:

" I never give anyone advice: it can backfire horribly. In the 1950s, Eric Morecambe told Ken Dodd to get his teeth fixed. But those teeth turned out to be one of Dodd's big selling points. "

Paul Merton

Never

Teeth

Selling

" I really don't take any interest at all in contemporary comedy. "

" And like the old stereotype, I overcame my shyness by making my friends laugh. "

" It seems like a contradiction, but the shy person who is a performer actually does make sense, because in a way, when you're young and shy, making people laugh is a good way to make friends. It's an instant connection. "

" I think having an outsider's viewpoint is interesting and good, especially for a comedian. "

" In 1986, I was attacked in the street as I helped Neil Mullarkey from the Comedy Store Players to put up posters. We were in the wrong place at the wrong time - midnight - and we were English. I got kicked in the head. "

" When things are difficult, awful, stressful, the thing that always gets you through is a sense of humour. I don't mean - well, maybe I do - laugh at the hangman as he puts the noose around your neck. But an eye, an ear, for the ridiculous, the absurd in life, can get you through a lot. "

" When I was nine I spent a lot of my time reading books about the history of comedy, or listening to the Goons or Hancock, humour from previous generations. "

" In fact, I don't watch a lot of contemporary comedy for fear of being influenced by it. "

" I looked at longevity in show business when I was about 13, and the people who seemed to have longevity were the ones who'd spent quite a bit of time learning about what they were doing before they made it. "

" I don't always vote in general elections, but I think I've always voted Labour. "

" When I wake up on a Monday morning and I realise I don't have to go and work at the civil service, I really think I've won. "

" My school days were the happiest days of my life; which should give you some indication of the misery I've endured over the past twenty-five years. "

" All disc jockeys are without talent. Noel Edmonds - I can't stand Noel Edmonds. "

" When I used to do the Edinburgh Festival, there was a bunch of guys selling fresh oysters and I'd eat ten daily - marvellous. "

" I was never one to go up to someone as a five- or six-year-old and say, 'Hello, my name's Paul, will you be my friend?' But I found if I did an impression of the PE teacher or whatever and people laughed, then they did like me, and so then they started talking to me, rather than me making the initial overture and then maybe being rebuffed. "

" The thing about improvisation is that it's not about what you say. It's listening to what other people say. It's about what you hear. "

" I've never been disappointed by politicians. I've never invested that much in them in the first place. "

" Generally speaking, politicians are an odd bunch. They seem to have very thick skins and genuinely don't care what people think. And charm is a very important part of the politician's armoury. I try to resist that kind of charm. "

" I was trying to organise my DVDs into a sort of chronological order, and I am afraid that it all trailed off after the Sixties. "

Paul Merton

Off

I Am

" I'll never forget my first experience of swede. It was at school and I thought I was getting mashed potato. I've never got over it. "

" I remember being fascinated by the very nature of comedy from the age of 10; why is this funny, and that isn't? "

" I have never sold my story, done 'Hello!' magazine, any of that stuff. I'm not guilty of exploiting my private life for cash and then saying, 'Oh, I don't want to talk about my private life.' I've never crossed that line. "

" In 1987, I was in Edinburgh doing my first one-man show. I took part in a kickabout with some fellow comedians and tripped over my trousers and heard this cracking sound in my leg. A couple of days later I went into a coma and was diagnosed with a pulmonary embolism. "

" If you became a comedian in the '80s, you had to work the circuit and make people laugh. Canned laughter is cheating. "

" I'm always amazed to hear of air crash victims so badly mutilated that they have to be identified by their dental records. What I can't understand is, if they don't know who you are, how do they know who your dentist is? "

" Beginning with a trip out to Ellis Island, I saw for myself where thousands of European immigrants took their first steps onto American soil, bringing with them nothing but their ambition: people such as Erich von Stroheim and Adolph Zukor. "

" The economics favour one-man comedy shows: all you need is one person, a microphone and a PA system. But I'm pleased so many people are making a living out of comedy - it's a wonderful business to be in. "

" On my first day in New York a guy asked me if I knew where Central Park was. When I told him I didn't he said, 'Do you mind if I mug you here?'. "

" Am I allowed to call myself working-class now? Because obviously I'm now very rich. "

Paul Merton

Call

Myself