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" I saw Aerosmith, and I was like, 'Wow, you can dress like a girl and still get girls? Hand me a scarf!' "
Greg Behrendt
You
Dress
Scarf
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" I don't have a massive fan base. I don't have Patton Oswalt numbers, but the fan base I have is incredibly generous, and of the 22,000 people who follow me on Twitter, I think almost all of those people participate. "
Greg Behrendt
People
Think
Numbers
" I think probably - I think, you know, when you're first dating somebody, if they're just not that physical with you, if they don't want to make concrete plans with you, you know, if they're sort of ambiguous about where everything is going, I think that's a pretty good sign that they're not into you. "
Greg Behrendt
Know
Dating
Think
" I love astute observations and really great wordplay. I love the way that Louis C.K. observes life, and I love the way Patton Oswalt talks about it. "
Greg Behrendt
Really
Way
Great
" I'm not a big fan of comedy roasts because most of the time I find them to be really mean, but once in a while, you'll hear something perfectly worded and well-crafted. "
Greg Behrendt
Time
Comedy
Big
" Part of being a comedian is that it's your job to look at life and regurgitate it in a funny way, to point out its absurdities. "
Greg Behrendt
Look
Point
Way
" I get giddy with the idea of stringing words together that make people laugh. "
Greg Behrendt
Together
Words
People
" Most authors writing books like 'He's Just Not That Into You' dream of doing what I was being asked to do. I didn't like it. I'm good at giving advice, but doing it on TV and radio felt wrong, and when people resisted my point of view, I was like, 'Why am I doing this? This was not the plan.' So I stopped. It didn't make me feel good. "
Greg Behrendt
Feel Good
Me
People
" Social media is a really cool way to tell your story to people who are interested in hearing it. It's not getting put through the filter of a television executive who's decided you're too old to justify the expenditure. "
Greg Behrendt
People
Cool
Story
" I went to stand-up when my rock n' roll dreams weren't coming true. I knew it wasn't going to happen when I was in a New Wave band in 1992 - at the height of grunge. Then I heard No Doubt's 'Spiderwebs' and I said, 'Well, we're done.' They did - and succeeded at - what we were trying to do. "
Greg Behrendt
Trying
Dreams
Rock
" I do think that you can dress yourself out of a problem. The way that a haircut and a new pair of pants can make you feel is better than any therapist, because when you look in the mirror, you see a different person - you are a different person. It's superficial change that can lead to real change. "
Greg Behrendt
Mirror
Change
Dress
" The great thing about comedy is that the longer you've been alive, the more you have to talk about and the better you get. I've got some miles and some road savviness that some other guys don't have. "
Greg Behrendt
Road
Better
Great
" This life is yours and no one else's, and if you spend your time looking at other people's pages, you'll never get anything done. "
Greg Behrendt
Time
You
Done
" I've never tried to pass myself off as anything more than a comedian who wrote a dating book. "
Greg Behrendt
Dating
Book
Never
" The best thing that can happen in a relationship is when you are the same person you were before the relationship started. You are not hiding anything, and you still have a life of your own. The other best thing is sex - that is a super positive. "
Greg Behrendt
You
Best
Life
" I was always funny, but I wasn't a great musician, and I wanted to be a musician way more than I wanted to be a comic. I just didn't think comedians were cool when I was a kid. "
Greg Behrendt
Funny
Great
Think
" We were raised to pursue women... Most of the guys I know enjoy the pursuit. But that doesn't mean women should be wallflowers. "
Greg Behrendt
Women
Pursue
Most
" I've learned that anything in life worth having comes from patience and hard work. "
Greg Behrendt
Patience
Work
Hard Work
" The one cool thing with getting older is that you can actively choose to just be an eccentric. "
Greg Behrendt
Getting Older
Cool
You
" Most comics worship music on some level. It's more rock-n-roll to get up there for an hour and make people laugh. "
Greg Behrendt
Up
Worship
People