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" I think as men begin to see things that address them, they will feel that they can relate. They can't relate to 'Basketball Wives,' 'Housewives of Atlanta.' I am not judging or criticizing those shows at all; what I am saying is the perspective is not necessarily the male perspective. 'Iyanla: Fix My Life' is inclusive of everyone. "

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" One of the ways that people avoid taking responsibility for their role in their own pain is what I call the BPs - blame and projection. "

Iyanla Vanzant

Responsibility

People

Own

" I had no preconceived idea what fame would be like, because I never thought I would be famous. I just wanted to do my work. Hell, I just wanted to pay my rent on time. "

" Everyone has something that blocks us from the full experience and expression of our nobility. "

Iyanla Vanzant

Expression

Experience

" I had to stop traveling alone because I missed so many planes. When somebody runs up to you in the airport and begins to tell you their life story, you can't say, 'Excuse me, boo,' as they're weeping on your bosom. "

Iyanla Vanzant

Alone

Life

" Order is the first law of heaven, and you have to have order to survive on Earth. Figure out what has to be done each day, each week, each year and develop a system to achieve it. "

" After being on 'Oprah' for a couple of months, I got my first royalty check for $1,478,392.17. I will never forget it. At the height of my career, I made $3.3 million. Unbelievable. From welfare in the projects to $3.3 million. "

" All things are lessons that God would have us learn. "

Iyanla Vanzant

God

Things

" In my deepest, darkest moments, what really got me through was a prayer. Sometimes my prayer was 'Help me.' Sometimes a prayer was 'Thank you.' What I've discovered is that intimate connection and communication with my creator will always get me through because I know my support, my help, is just a prayer away. "

" People say I've had a difficult time in life. I think I've had an exciting time in life. "

" Be willing to share all of who you are. So many of us want a partner, but we're not willing to show all of us. "

" Oprah Winfrey gives you the stage? Shut your mouth. I said, 'I'm sorry for taking over your show.' She said, 'No, that's why we have you here.' "

" Talk about your negative experiences with the father, with your girlfriends. Not with your children. And bite your tongue when it comes to diminishing, denying, dismissing, name-calling. "

" Everybody's got a 'thing.' Some 'things' are nice and quiet. Some 'things' have fangs and claws. Some 'things' stink and have slobber everywhere. "

" Some of us pray demands. Some of us pray complaints. Some of us pray knowing, and some of us pray not knowing. But prayer is the attitude that you hold in your heart. "

Iyanla Vanzant

Attitude

Heart

" I've seen the good, the bad, and the ugly. Lived it and I'm still here to talk about it and help someone else if I can. "

" In order to feel loved, be respected and stay connected, we humans have a tendency to lie. We lie about who we are, what we want, what we need, what we have done or will do. Perhaps 'lie' is too strong a word. Let me say that what we do is withhold the truth. "

" If you're not willing to let your partner see your cellulite or know your biggest fears, then you aren't really ready to share yourself. "

" I'm really not that fierce. "

Iyanla Vanzant

Fierce

Really

" You know, if you're a human and living on the planet, it doesn't matter what you do; you are not immune to the challenges, the trials, the difficulty. And that fact that I happen to be a coach and a minister and a spiritual teacher doesn't mean anything. I'm still human. "

" I gave myself permission to feel and experience all of my emotions. In order to do that, I had to stop being afraid to feel. In order to do that, I taught myself to believe that no matter what I felt or what happened when I felt it, I would be okay. "

" I'm focusing on healing lives and teaching people that they can heal - giving them tools to heal. "

" If you don't like your sister or don't get along with your father, let's find out if you like yourself. Let's not sugarcoat anything about it. "

" You've got to know what your 'thing' is, and you've got to call it a 'thing,' whether it's meanness, nastiness, un-forgiveness, arrogance, ego, resistance, rebelliousness or defiance. Everybody's got a 'thing,' and once you call your 'thing' a 'thing,' we can give it a place to be or dismiss it. "

" When you gossip, it's self-hexing. Because when you do it, it comes back to you. Everything starts with the word. The word is demonstrating a condition of the mind. If it's in your mind and comes out of your mouth, it will be created. "

" In my mind, marriage is a spiritual partnership and union in which we willingly give and receive love, create and share intimacy, and open ourselves to be available and accessible to another human being in order to heal, learn and grow. "

" Gossip is when you have a malice of intent or mindless, third-party conversation to someone about someone, something you haven't said to that someone. "

" I grew up in the Holiness Church, where prayer was an event. "

Iyanla Vanzant

Holiness

Prayer

" What I am doing; how I am being as I am doing it; and does it bring honor to my community? What is the lesson in what I am doing? And most importantly, am I having fun? "

" I have learned the hard way to mind my business, without judging who people are and what they do. I am more troubled by the lack of space being provided for the truth to unfold. Humans cannot seem to wait for or honor the truth. Instead, we make it up based on who we believe people should or should not be. "

" Pain is pain, hurt is hurt, fear is fear, anger is anger, and it has no color. "