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" I wanted to communicate and connect. I simply didn't seem able to do it. "
Mary Gaitskill
Able
Communicate
Connect
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" Everyone says 'Anna Karenina' is about individual desire going against society, but I actually think the opposite is stronger: the way societal forces limit the expression of the individual. "
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" On the rare occasions when my mother perfumed herself, she was going out, and so I rarely smelled those special scents up close on her body, except during kisses goodbye. "
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" You can't tell an 18-year-old to keep it down and turn off Britney Spears or whatever it is that they listen to. "
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" The appeal of perfume is that it is at once ephemeral and empowering. It creates a shimmering invisible armor that lingers in a room long after its wearer has gone and infuses our imagination with a subtle power, hinting at a hidden identity. "
Mary Gaitskill
Identity
Gone
Imagination
" For two people to satisfy everything each needs for their entire lives is a tall order. Some couples may be equipped to do this. Some are not. "
Mary Gaitskill
Tall
Everything
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" I used to start at about 10 at night and work until early morning. My preferred way to work is to start in the early afternoon and work until about 3, go do errands, have dinner, and then write for a few more hours in the evening. "
Mary Gaitskill
Morning
Work
Way
" When looking out the window and watching the water becomes a drama, then literally everything is a drama. "
Mary Gaitskill
Watching
Drama
Looking
" Not being locked into one set of feelings, which you run the risk of mistaking for the truth, you have greater and more intense access to all feeling states, including those you would never choose to act out. "
Mary Gaitskill
Truth
Feeling
Feelings
" It's scary to me to watch the world around us get less and less physical while in the imaginary world of pop culture, aggressive impulses and fear reactions are floridly, furiously stoked and indulged. "
Mary Gaitskill
World
Scary
Me
" I had really wanted adventure. At the time that I ran away, lots of kids ran away from home. It was something of a social phenomenon. "
Mary Gaitskill
Had
Time
Social
" Between my hatred of mall shopping and my mother's firm ideas about how a girl should dress, my style choices were pretty unenthusiastic: plaid skirts or whatever empire-waisted thingamabob was on sale at Sears. "
Mary Gaitskill
Dress
Girl
Style
" People say that if you talk too much about sex, you take away the mystery. I say, if you're somebody who likes to talk, talk all you want - it's not listening. You will never take away the mystery. "
Mary Gaitskill
You
Listening
Mystery
" At 16, I was in Toronto and very shy and not hanging around with anyone who was intellectual in the slightest, so I didn't really have the means to discuss what I was seeing and feeling. "
Mary Gaitskill
Seeing
Shy
Who
" Stories are the rich, unseen underlayer of the most ordinary moments. "
Mary Gaitskill
Moments
Most
Stories
" Where I grew up, in the Detroit area, there was a really good station. Sometimes you would hear songs for the first time on the radio, and if a really special song came on, somebody would turn it up, and everybody would just stop talking. "
Mary Gaitskill
Good
Song
Special
" A sad person who is so involved with his sadness that he mistakes it for reality will have a hard time seeing himself as anything but sad. For him, the sadness is not a feeling that he experiences - it is him. "
Mary Gaitskill
Time
Mistakes
Reality
" My parents had met in high school and married right after my father came back from World War II. They honeymooned in Paris and returned to that city when my father, in college on the G.I. Bill, was awarded a Fulbright Scholarship. "
Mary Gaitskill
Parents
School
War
" When I was writing 'Bad Behavior,' I was very, very quiet. I would just sit there and listen to people. And if I was out in public, I was usually quiet, and people tended to assume I was stupid because I was a young, pretty girl who's quiet. "
Mary Gaitskill
Writing
Behavior
People
" The first person to blow up my fashion consciousness was a 14-year-old girl named Sandrine. She was the most beautiful human I had ever seen. "
Mary Gaitskill
Fashion
Beautiful
She
" I had a strong conviction that there was something out there in the world that was wonderful. "
Mary Gaitskill
World
Strong
Conviction
" Perhaps it should be obvious: Adultery is a social threat that arouses raw anger and fear, which the bellicose then need to discharge rather than merely feel, traditionally on the philandering wife or the female home-wrecker. "
Mary Gaitskill
Feel
Fear
Need
" If anything is scary about my writing, it's that it's the product of a very particular vision and doesn't reference common speech that heavily. By 'common speech,' I don't mean language as much as an agreed-on way of seeing, or a shorthand. "
Mary Gaitskill
Writing
Language
Way
" I think people try to make the most of their time on Earth and also to 'fix' their time on Earth. "
Mary Gaitskill
Time
Think
People
" I think that with the proliferation of writing programs, people tend to forget that you also have to get used to working alone, and you have to be your own support. "
Mary Gaitskill
Alone
People
Support
" I didn't like horses when I was a kid. "
Mary Gaitskill
Like
Kid
Horses
" I didn't start thinking about what I wanted to do professionally until I was 17. I was a hippie, but I did write. "
Mary Gaitskill
Thinking
Write
Start
" Something like riding a horse - which I've recently started doing - requires courage, especially for me, as I started out being actually scared of horses. "
Mary Gaitskill
Courage
Riding
Me
" I found the world extraordinarily strange, having first left home at 15. "
Mary Gaitskill
Strange
First
Found
" It's true that your environment influences how you write. "
Mary Gaitskill
Environment
How
Your
" There is a sense in which we have - like, I go in to teach a class; I may be somewhat different than I would be talking to you, although it's related because it's public. I'm very different with my roommate or my lover or my cats. But I don't know if that means you're acting, really, if you're being truthful. "
Mary Gaitskill
Talking
Know
Teach