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" If you're a balanced cartoonist, you're not a cartoonist. You definitely have to have a bias. "

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" The problem when you're a cartoonist and you go into the voting booth is that you have your choice of two guys - one would be best for your country, and one would be best for your business. "

" I look at people, and I like to laugh at them. "

" Everybody's funny-looking. "

" The best cartoons have no words at all - just the image pops out. "

" Editorial pages all say, 'Well, the other guy has a point, too. It remains to be seen how this will come out. We certainly hope it comes out fine; blah, blah.' Cartoonists don't go that way. Our job is to stick out our tongues, to show a big raspberry to whatever pompous jerk happens to be mouthing off. "

" I thought that through the strip, I could vent my spleen and be funny at the same time. But when it comes to humor, there's no substitute for reality and politicians. "

" I'm looking forward to working for the 'Tribune' because any company that can invest in the Chicago Cubs has a view of the future we cannot begin to comprehend. "

" That really has been my message over the years: 'Hey, we're all in this together, so let's laugh about it a little, please.' It adds perspective to an argument if you know where you're coming from. "

" I don't need a lot of attention. I'd much rather have the work be famous than the face be famous. "

" I really do have a self-censorship problem, which isn't the way you should be if you're a cartoonist. "

" The best thing for my creative process is a deadline. "

" My father was very methodical about life. He'd always ask me, 'Now, what's your system? What's your schedule like?' I have no big system, no rigid schedule. When he would ask, 'How do you do this? Give it to me step by step,' I'd try to convince him that there were no step-by-steps. "

" Because of my grey hair and glasses, people think I'm Phil Donahue. "

" I'm kind of a nerd. A square. And I'm terrible at telling jokes. I always forget the punch line. "