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" I'm thirty years old, but I read at the thirty-four-year-old level. "

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" Describing comic sensibility is near impossible. It's sort of an abstract silliness, that sometimes the joke isn't the star. "

" I have a theory that if you're famous more years than you're not famous, then you get a little nutty. "

" I recently found out about this other super movie star. He only works from about 11:00 to 4:00, so all his movies take like 120 days. But this was a lot of stuff to do in 35 days. "

" We didn't even think about it, you know? I used to collect laser discs, and you'd have some college professor analyzing It's a Wonderful Life or Citizen Kane, and now it is pretty funny - the idea of commentary for a silly kid's movie, you know? "

" It's almost like he's started to sound even more exotic the more people started doing him. I don't know why, but there's just something about Al Gore that makes me laugh. "

" I think free speech is probably the coolest thing we have in this country, and again, you can label it hate speech and dismiss it, and then you're allowed to censor it. "

" I wasn't very good as a puppet. A lot of times in a movie, you need a really good puppeteer: you're sort of a puppet, and you're doing what you can. But I always, from the beginning, was kind of making up my own stuff from stand-up and sort of directing myself, so I wasn't very good in movies where I didn't have control. "

" I pretty much try to stay in a constant state of confusion just because of the expression it leaves on my face. "

" I've never really worked on them. Just once in a while one hits me and makes me laugh. My Al Gore was sort of like a gay Gomer Pyle. "

" That's why modern corporate movie making has become so laborious that comedians are kind of kicked out by 50. "

" I don't find biology as interesting as politics and humanism. I talk more about existential stuff. "

" This movie will actually increase the sex life of parents everywhere because they can put this on, with the 45 minutes of extras and they've got almost two hours to do whatever they've got to do while the kids watch the movie. "

" Monty Python never directly said, 'We're liberals' - they just did their sketches, and you had to figure it out. Generally, they were anti-establishment, of course, making fun of the people in power. I think, comedians, that's their job - pointing out what other people might not notice and going, 'Yoo-hoo, over here.' "

" I had written in another draft a completely different kind of fight, but they said they couldn't afford to shoot it. They needed a fight scene, though, so I was told to put a fight scene in, but not the one I had written. "

" I couldn't do any of my other characters, you know? But I could have done the lady. Church Lady's Malibu Beach party is an idea I have for a movie, too. Yes. "

" In maybe 1963, we had 'Collier's Encyclopedia,' and they sent us their yearly LP. I heard the Beatles talking on there. That was the first time I tried altering my voice, doing a Liverpudlian accent. "

" The two things that can hurt you are if you need money or if you need fame. Those are the things that can be your Achilles heel. But if you don't need money and you don't need fame, then you're free. "

" Definitely for me, my personality, having children was a definite sea change. I found it very, very hard to balance show business and being a dad. The narcissism of show business and the complete, total focus of it was very difficult. "

" I really enjoy being a dad, and maybe I took it too seriously, but I love being around my kids. "

" I enjoy pushing my characters to the limit. No matter how far out there I go, I look for things that make the characters human. "

" I have this dream life where I get to be a celebrity but I get to navigate the world fairly easily because I'm always in character. "

" Well, I loved variety in television, I loved sketch comedy. At 'Saturday Night Live,' I stayed almost seven years. "

" When people come to see my stand-up, they get a chance to see my characters interact with each other. "

" While many comics have a secret persona, I fundamentally want to be myself. "