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" I've never bought a Dylan record. A singing poet? It just bores me to tears. I've got to tell you, if I had 10 Dylans in the final of 'American Idol,' we would not be getting 30 million viewers a week. I don't believe the Bob Dylans of this world would make 'American Idol 'a better show. "

Simon Cowell

World

Believe

American

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" I'm not that musical. I don't really know how a record is produced, and, funnily enough, I don't want to. "

" If I go into a relationship with an artist, which at most is going to last five years, we have a 100-page contract covering every eventuality. Whereas with marriage you go into it with no contract, with laws that date back hundreds of years, and I don't think that's right. "

" If I went to a psychiatrist, it would be a long session. I've always thought that I do have a number of issues that probably need dealing with, because I am quite odd in some ways. "

" The end of the animal trade would leave more time to trap or beat to death pop star wannabes. "

" Whether they run a record company or a grocery store, every boss will tell you you're in big trouble if you're borrowing more than you can ever afford to pay back. Delaying the pain for future generations is suicidal. We've got to start getting the deficit down right now, not next year. "

" Every show I've ever, you know, produced, essentially it's the show I want to watch myself. "

" I suggest we bring some normality back to this country and say if you are carrying a knife, there must be zero tolerance. If it was up to me, everyone caught with a knife would get an automatic ten year sentence. "

" The object of this competition is not to be mean to the losers but to find a winner. The process makes you mean because you get frustrated. "

" If your lifeguard duties were as good as your singing, a lot of people would be drowning. "

" If I had one dog, I'd want a hundred. If I had one kid, I'd probably want a hundred. I mean, it's just the way I am. "

" People confuse ego, lust, insecurity with true love. "

" You always want to go to a party where you get an invite. "

Simon Cowell

Always

You

" I love producing shows. And so when you're on a show where other people are making decisions you don't necessarily agree with it, after a while you start to feel like a passenger. "

" The young people working for me are ambitious and hard-working. That work ethic has always been a trait of the British. "

Simon Cowell

Work Ethic

Young

" I think that by ignoring the show you're ignoring the audience who put you there. "

" In TV, film, and music there's a lot of snobbery, and I don't like it. I've never been a cultural snob. "

" You are a saucy little thing aren't you? "

" We have hated the French for years. Now you have just joined the club. It makes you much more likable. "

" Rules equal boredom, and I don't like that. "

Simon Cowell

Boredom

Rules

" I've always been petrified of working for a boss who I didn't like but who I was in fear of, because I wanted my salary. "

" Money brings you security and choice. You can make decisions in a different way if you have a lot of money. But when you have nothing, you have a naivety, and a more fearless attitude because you have nothing to lose. "

" No one really has any job security anymore, including myself. "

" I don't like kids that are pushed into things by stage mums, but when I can see they are having a good time, they're excited and enjoying the process, then I think it's wrong to discriminate. "

" When I was young and we got caught pinching apples, we got a smack from the local policeman. Today if that happened he would be sued. There is a tendency to punish the victim, not the criminal. If someone broke into my house or my mum's house, I worry that the burglar has more rights than me. "

" My attitude is, if someone's going to criticize me, tell me to my face. "

" I don't mind being cast as some kind of a pantomime baddie, but I am very fair in business. I always have been. I pride myself on being fair. "

" The minute you start assuming that the audience is very happy to see the same show again, you're dead. "

" I have total respect for anyone who discovers a band like Snow Patrol. I would be hopeless at signing a rock band, or anything alternative, cause I don't know what that audience are into and I don't particularly like that kind of music. "

" I get very anti-social, depressed and irritable with people. I don't have time for them. I can't make phone calls and stuff. I just sit on my own for days. "

" I've had Botox, but then again pretty much everyone I know has. To me, Botox is no more unusual than toothpaste. It works. You do it once a year - who cares? "

Simon Cowell

You